Can't see it posted again this week
And apologies as I can't remember who originally wrote it. But one of my favourite ever QOTW answers involved this poor bloke who came back from a night out absolutely off his tits.

He then attempted to make a fry up but in the dark and the drunkeness mistook the washing up liquid for cooking oil.

It also reminds me of the time at uni when my flatmate came home and decided he wanted some pasta and pesto. Unfortunately he didn't have any pasta left so he just ate the full jar of pesto with a spoon. In the morning his breath could have cut through metal and the memory still makes me snort coffee out of my nose!
(Milo Minderbinder, Tue 23 Sep 2008, 9:36, 3 replies)

Nicely done!
I wish I could read the original of that story, sounds great!
( Cawl, Tue 23 Sep 2008, 9:46, closed)

Cooking oil sabotage - creative
A girl with whom I went to university had a flatmate who was partial to a bevvy or two, so when he got home after an extended session one night and had a sudden rabid craving for fried eggs she replaced the cooking oil with lime cordial and watched him cook. Apparently even runny green fried eggs will do if you're drunk enough.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Sep 2008, 15:24, closed)

Fry up
No, surely he found an apricot in a glass in the fridge, and, not realising this, spent the next hour wondering why his egg was not frying very quickly.
(Benzyl, Tue 23 Sep 2008, 16:44, closed)