Just a couple
No funny story of me wiping my cock anywhere, but I'm definitely a natural at sabotaging it for myself.

Like when I hid some pubes in the head of a mate's pint but had to drink it by forfeit as we couldn't keep from giggling whenever he would bring it to his lips :(

Other disasters include burning garlic bread in the microwave (the smoke was like letting off a can of cs gas) and waking up at a festival (hungover to fuck of course), with the worst dry mouth ever, reaching for a coke bottle and downing a pint Jack Daniels (in a coke bottle)... at least the others found it funny.

Needless to say with the above history I don't get to cook very often!

*post below reminded me of the time I woke up thirsty and drank a can vimto that was left out. I soon stopped when It felt 'lumpy'. Yup, fucking ants! I was six and would check every morning after for spotty poo.
(suicidalducky has too much time on his hands, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 2:28, 2 replies)

That's really
upping the ante.

Ta
(AndyC4m Eject Eject [><], Wed 24 Sep 2008, 9:28, closed)

Waking up with a dry mouth...
'Kin hate that, especially when hung over....

Nowt worse!
(Lip Up Fatty Fatty Reggae still loves BBQ food on, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 13:06, closed)