Foot in Mouth SyndromeWhat's the worst social gaffe you've ever made? When you know you've said the wrong thing to the wrong person and wish the ground would swallow you up. In other words you've just contracted a bad case of foot in mouth syndrome. Tell us your stories and we'll share your pain.
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rob, Tue 20 Apr 2004, 22:27)
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narrow escapeas a confused squirt on the school bus, I was once asked, in the spirit of childist victim lust, whether I was a virgin. Obviously I was-as I'm sure the rest of the bus was too. I was only wee. It was a wee bus. Only way you can reply to such a dangerously grown up question is by out-duding your opponents with stuff that makes them look stupid. My mind drifted back to the delphic temple in 'Carry on Caesar'tm which had two entrances, one labelled 'virgins' for all the beautiful priestesses that sid james burp-grunted after (I wasn't one of them!) the other labelled 'eunuchs'. Was this the deft quip that would stun the grunts into silence, shamed at their own ignorance that men virgins were called eunuchs? all eyes on the back seats boring into me I mumbled 'ah shurup fat legs' and threw a cheesy quaver at them.
Didn't know I saved myself through lack of dramatic instinct. Could have precipitated a life of victimisation and addiction, blue cans and glue. Sounds quite good actually. Beter than typing smarm to hollow people.
(, Wed 21 Apr 2004, 12:34, Reply)
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