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This is a question Gambling

Broke the bank at Las Vegas, or won a packet of smokes for getting your tinkle out in class? Outrageous, heroic or plain stupid bets.

Suggested by SpankyHanky

(, Thu 7 May 2009, 13:04)
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Don't accept daft bets...
Just remembered a weird bet, actually. An 'I bet you...' sort of bet rather than an 'Alf Ramsey's Porn Dungeon each-way in the 3:30 at Sandown' sort of bet, but still...

I work in advertising. The nuts and bolts side rather than the 'Let's just have a Gorilla drumming' side. I plan campaigns, basically.

Now, a lot of people who work in Marketing are lovely, but like any job you do get your fair share of born arseholes who cover up their lack of knowledge and intelligence by being aggressive and overbearing, normally by belittling any point anyone else makes. The sort of people you normally see on the Apprentice, in fact.

One such was a South African Marketing Manager who was brought in one one of my clients a few years back. True to national stereotypes, he was loud, brash, snide, and aggressive (sorry to any Saffers reading, I know you're not all like that). Anyway, he hadn't been in the UK long, meaning he had very little idea of the UK media, but he nonetheless felt he knew enough to pull apart every recommendation we made and basically tell us what to do. This would have been fine if there was any logic to his criticisms, but it was simply that everything we did must be wrong, because he hadn't done it himself, therefore it was inferior. The situation could only be remedied by being a cock till he got what he wanted.

Now, it came to be that we were looking at appropriate TV programmes to sponsor for his brand. We'd go in and suggest programmes which we thought were a great fit with the audience (middle aged or retired women), supply videos and detailed justifications of why they were a good fit, and he'd slag them off.

Heartbeat? 'I want to sell to them - I can't do that if they're asleep'
Loose Women? 'I watched that the other day... what the fuck was that about?'
Countdown? 'Who enjoys that? People with Asperger's?'

Anyway, it so happens he has seen a programme he thinks is bang on.

'I was watching it the other day - 'Coast'. It's cosy, it's on at the right time, it's perfect....'
'Erm, admittedly it's a good fit but...'
'No buts, alright? Just let's get on it. We've wasted enough time'
'We can't do it'

He started to steam:

'Oh for fuck's sake, man.You mean YOU can't do it. If I can't get anywhere with you lot I'm going to have to find an agency I can work with. Or fuck that - you give me a contact and I'm going to call them myself and show you.'
'I am telling you now you cannot sponsor Coast'
'I bet you twenty quid I can at least have a fucking conversation about it , alright? everyone's in this business for the same reason. Money talks, right? I know that if you don't'
'OK, twenty quid'
'What's the contact'
'Just Google 'BBC Switchboard''
'You don't even have a fucking sales contact.'
'Afraid not'.

Apparently, he did call them as well. His successor, who was at this time his assistant, later described to me how he sat there turning increasingly crimson as the Licence Fee was patiently explained to him.

Did I get my twenty quid? Did I fuck. He claimed he had at least had a conversation about it. Cock...
(, Thu 7 May 2009, 14:29, 8 replies)
Have a click

I used to work for a Saffer, arrogant, overbearing bully.

BTW given that demographic, WTF was the product? Incontinence pants?
(, Thu 7 May 2009, 14:48, closed)
That would be outing myself...
...if anyone I knew read this. But it was food.
(, Thu 7 May 2009, 15:24, closed)
Great story.
(, Thu 7 May 2009, 17:00, closed)
that's not good...

that's fucking great!

Cheers, matey.
(, Thu 7 May 2009, 17:03, closed)
Conversation? He did too.
Probably just to spite you out of the 20 quid.

Edit: In fact, you should probably pay up. You can make it a Pyrrhic victory for him by saying "Worth every penny" as you do so.
(, Thu 7 May 2009, 17:55, closed)
In his defence...
...he did have a conversation about it.

Although his side probably ended a bit "Oh, right. No, I get it now. Sorry to trouble you."

(, Thu 7 May 2009, 18:26, closed)
This is...

Highly excellent.

Have a click
(, Thu 7 May 2009, 18:30, closed)
Incompetence and intransigence my favorite combination.

And much as I hate to disagree with the luminaries above, I think that [i]you[/i] win. He didn't have a conversation about sponsoring a BBC program. He had a conversation about [i]not[/i] being able to do so. Seems very different to me.
(, Mon 11 May 2009, 18:01, closed)

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