Clarification
OK, what I said obviously hurt a lot of people who it wasn't aimed at.I wouldn't wish to belittle their struggle and their fortitude in dealing with an abusive childhood, and I don't think they should "toughen up", if by that you mean become a hard, abusive person. Being strong is different from being tough or hard.

I didn't have any kids until I was 28 because I was terrified that my experience would make me a paedophile, I also stopped drinking for 4 years because I got pissed and rowed with my wife, and was scared that I would become violent in drink. There are some who can't help but be damaged by a bad childhood, and struggle to be a good person despite the damage done to them, and a salute them, they have dealt with more than I have, and many of them are better people than I.

However, I have met people who will justify violence towards others, sexual predation and criminality because of abuse they received, and have even used this as a excuse for murder. You can't have a free pass for acting evil because you were treated badly. If you think that, I will respectfully disagree. The guy who abused me and my sister was abused, so does that mean he should be excused?

You are not one of the people I was thinking of when I wrote my original post, and neither are all the others who struggle to rise above their bad experiences, but as you said: live and let live (within reason - personally not down with paedos, thieves and the like)

Again, I am sorry if I offended, that wasn't my intention
(micmac is happy as a pig in shite, Thu 7 May 2009, 8:35, Reply)