I have a guilty secret pertaining to my arse.
I don't wipe it, instead I wash it with a bottle of water and then use one sheet of paper to dry it.

This may sound filthy and wrong, but actually it's a lot cleaner (after all, it's only your own shit that you're touching, and you wash your hands afterwards).

It's good for the planet, and doesn't leave you with an itchy crack later in the day.

And yes, it's pleasurable knowing that when the bog roll runs out, you're safe.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Fri 14 Mar 2008, 14:46, 4 replies)

It's only your own shit you're touching
No problem then.
(frankspencer, Fri 14 Mar 2008, 14:49, closed)

India
Isn't that the traditional way it's done in a lot of Eastern toilets, particularly in India? No paper, you just wash your arse with either a jet or a bucket of water and dry afterwards.

Actually ends up cleaner than if you just wiped.
(calamarain just invented dehydrated water, Fri 14 Mar 2008, 15:08, closed)

a jet I can understand
and I could happily use one of those

splashing water at your ringpiece from a bucket or a bottle though, don't see the effectiveness there.

also, surely there is the danger of soaking your clothes?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 14 Mar 2008, 15:40, closed)

It's perfectly effective.
Obviously you have to 'wipe' with your left hand too. And no, you don't soak your clothes - you stick the bottle under the rim of the toilet seat so it's directed at your arse.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Fri 14 Mar 2008, 15:54, closed)