Farmyard frolics
I remember a bitterly cold morning during Christmas holidays in the early 80's.
My best friend and I were messing about skating on his dad's goldfish pond, making snowmen and having snowball fights in the farmyard just over the wall of the back garden.
We had been outside for a fair while and our hands and feet were frosted and we just couldn't get warm.
The farmer came across and said, "Yer boys, you do looked shrammed* roight up"
We were indeed.
"Tell e what, zee that there pile o' stuff? Tiz proper warm that zee, got zdeam comin' out o' 'im n'all. You d'wanna ztick yer 'ands n veet in un."
So we did.
Yes, it had steam coming off it.
Yes, we did take our gloves and boots off and stick our appendages into it.
Yes, it was warm(ish).
Yes, it was indeed horse manure.
Idiots.
I'll bet the old bastard had a right chuckle at that.

*freezing cold
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Fri 22 Aug 2008, 9:47, Reply)