when i was in china a few years back
I went out after work with a few buddies, we ended up in the Reggae bar - Hangzhou (if anyone knows it).

Anyway, im sitting there and i catch the eye of a rather cute girl sitting with her mates. I wonder over and start talking. Even though she speaks broken english, after a few more beers and flirting I am sucking her face off. One things leads to another am i am soon at home performing bedroom Olympics with the girl.

The next day in work i arrived to a round of applause, the word had got around that i had been lucky, and got my end away.

10 minutes later two of my mates come over.

"Hey 'Dan', did you like that bird last night?

"Yeah she was quality"

"Yeah, we paid her for that"


WHAT?!?!?!? I thought. She was a hooker? How did I not know this? This can’t be true.


"You’re kidding me?" I said the shock now dawning on my face

"nah mate, when you went the bog we approached her with £50 to sleep with you, you mentioned a few days back it had been a while, so we thought we'd give you a helping hand"

FUCK! i thought, i felt sick, i felt exploited.

This was nasty. I had been duped.

"Your kidding me - right?" I said. Looking and hoping it was just a trick.

at this point the lads saw my face, looked at one another,

"erm, yeah, we were only kiddin" they said unconvincingly.

"you WERE kidding right lads?" I confirmed.

"yeah hehe (nervous laughter) defo mate."

(it turned out she wasn’t a hooker. It was all a game of bluffs on their part)

We then returned to work. However I couldn’t work. Things were running through my mind.

Now ill admit I have been with a Hooker before, im not proud of it. But at least I KNEW it was one, I hadn’t asked for a hooker. This was evil.

over every Ciggy break i had a one to one with one of the lads. The conversation would go something like this.

me "mate, were you kiddn or what?"

mate "do you want me to be honest?"

"yeah"

"no, we were serious, she was a hooker"

Followed by a conversation of

me "mate, were you kiddn or what?"

mate "do you want me to be honest?"

"yeah"

"no, we were messing we have never seen her before"


I have never felt so sick before. Confusion prevailed, i have never felt so exploited before.

I ended up seeing her loads, and then again when I returned a months later. We are still in touch to this day.
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Fri 22 Aug 2008, 11:36, Reply)