Long post - no funnies
I apologise to objects when I knock them, even lightly. I eat food from least tasty to most tasty, so that I've got something to look forward to.

I used to have to check the front door multiple times when I go out, until I found that looking at my watch and memorising the time when I check the door helps.

I hate flies. Not all of them, just the big, buzzy bastards that like to fly around my head. I go mental when I'm trying to eat and a fly turns up. It's cos I was told that they vomit on their food to break it down. But I can't kill them - that's "bad karma", so I spend ages trying to shoo them outside or catch them in a glass to be released outside. This often leads to excessive hand cleaning. If I've touched something unclean, I have to clean my hands (and the faucet).

I can't touch something that's been on the floor. It's less bad at home, but there is almost no way I will touch something on the floor outside or in a public place. Strangely, this doesn't include my handbag. I don't even like tying my shoelaces if they've come undone and trailed on the ground. My fella will however pick things up off the floor, but bless him, he knows that I won't touch him until he either uses my portable handwash or washes his hands.

I hold my breath for at least 8 seconds when someone sneezes or coughs so I don't catch their lurgy. Sometimes I get caught in an infinite loop when lots of people cough or I get stuck on a number (often the number 16). It's tricky deciding whether or not to breathe while also trying to count.

I get distressed when I've lost something that I'm looking for, especially if it's something important like my chequebook. My fella does not feel that losing my chequebook is something to worry about, because "you can just get a new one and cancel any cheques (if it's been stolen)". That's just not good enough - I need to find the one I've lost. This led me to threatening him with physical violence because he said it wasn't important. It bloody well is important to me.

Apologies for dullness.
(farty_bumbum, Fri 2 Jul 2010, 17:04, 7 replies)

You'd love me.
I have asthma, and my main symptom is to cough. No infection to speak of, just coughing. My longest coughing fit to date lasted an hour and a half.
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Fri 2 Jul 2010, 17:17, closed)

I like to think I'd just leave, but then I'd have to come back to check on you and make sure you hadn't died.
(farty_bumbum, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:26, closed)

Headcase!
Your fella deserves a medal.

How do you put your socks on?
(Suck it and Sea, Fri 2 Jul 2010, 17:43, closed)

Finally
someone else who does the food thing! Everyone just looks at me like I'm weird when I explain if they ask :/
(epinephrine, Fri 2 Jul 2010, 18:04, closed)

****ING FLIES!!!!!!!
i am with you all the way with those buzzy bastards
(DreddPirateBob has watched every scifi film ever on, Sat 3 Jul 2010, 1:35, closed)

The trick with the sneezing one is to inhale carefully near the closest hard surface such as a window because the laminar air flow will ensure that this is the last place the sneeze air gets to.
(Benzyl, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 21:51, closed)

:D
Thanks for this. I would try it, but I don't want to look like I'm sniffing the table. That's just weird...
(farty_bumbum, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:26, closed)