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This is a question Heckles II

It was my privilege the other month to see a particularly foul and abusive heckler literally chased out of a comedy club by enraged punters. So: Comedy nights, staff meetings, football matches. Tell us of epic or rubbish heckles.

(, Thu 12 Jun 2014, 14:36)
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My brother was at that Cambridge being all clever at that Mathematics back in them 1990s
In his final year he had a fancy flat style device in which to house himself and his gubbins. I was over to visit, mainly to play olde tyme vidya-gums on his Macintosh whilst he was away doing something productive and scholarly.

Whilst taking a break from conquering space and time itself, I went out onto the first floor balcony to take in the view. Who should I spy not some 200 yards distant but John 'Inspector Morse' Thaw, having some similar balcony based larks. Time for some belligerent fun, I thought, save for the inclusion of the word 'belligerent', which I didn't know the meaning of at that time.

"Solve this one, Sherlock!" I smugly said in my own voice in my own head and let out a confusing yelp, carefully intoned to be part cry of distress, part existential bleat and part exuberant throat bugle (if anyone has ever seen the Mulligan & O'Hare Vic-n-Bob sketches, it was very much modelled on Bob's yell that finished a lot of their songs). The telly sleuth reacted in a flash, slowly turning his head in my direction and mustering his best middle distance frown.

I ducked, giggling and crept back to my game, safe in the knowledge that Thaw wouldn't be sleuthing his way to the bottom of that obnoxious mystery. Years later he died of heart boo-boos and I like to think my drive-by shouting had something to do with it.

God that's awful. Too late now though. SCIENCE BLESS YOU!
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 14:36, 8 replies)
I am drawn to the smell of your dermatological cream.

(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 14:40, closed)
Best of all the Alan Bennet short story collections.

(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 14:51, closed)
I am hesitant
Because of your tiny Beadle-like hand.
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 15:42, closed)
you still don't know what "vicarious" means
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 14:49, closed)
Truly have you shamed me most proper
And now you are the Big Man, the crown has been posted and your certificate of Internet Ownership will be issued in 6-8 weeks.

I have edited my post to reflect my utter humiliation.

Additionally it has the effect of making your post seem irrelevant and churlish. Well, more so, anyway.
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 15:48, closed)

(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 16:40, closed)
It was hard, typing legibly through the tears but I managed it.
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 16:44, closed)
I wasted 90 seconds scanning the post for the misuse of vicarious
and then I find it deleted.
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 16:46, closed)
I can send you a stopwatch
With 90 seconds already clocked up on it and then you can start it and do something you enjoy and that you feel validates you; in this way will you be compensated. Also please accept my humblest pollo-jizz.
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 16:55, closed)
Drive-by shouting?!
OFSTED plaudits!
(, Mon 16 Jun 2014, 15:05, closed)

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