I’m beginning to see a pattern!
Again back in my early 20’s the group of friends I was in all drank in this one pub, every night we’d be in there it was a great place, the bar staff all knew us, and we would regularly get away with things that would have gotten others thrown out and/or arrested!

Well this one Friday night we’re all sitting in our usual corner drinking lots, when in walks one of our group who’d been absent for a while, he said he was ill, but we all knew he was bullshitting, and that he’d vanished because a lady friend of his had told him to piss off back to whatever hole he’d crawled out of.

He was not well liked, mainly because he liked to hit on any girl in the group, be they single or not, and for his penchant for lies!

So we were all sitting there having a drink and in he walks, and offers to buy us all a drink because he has some news for us! Never ones to pass up on a drink we all ordered bottles of cider, 15 of us!

Well the young lady from my last post http://www.b3ta.com/questions/hell/post327284 was sitting right next to me as she always tended to do, and I knew that this bloke fancied her, so I hatched a plan!

His news was that he had leukemia, we were sure he didn’t and that he was just a lying bastard!

When it came to getting the next round I put my plan into action, and got my mates girlfriend to come on to him and get him to buy the booze, which he did, for the rest of the night! He got nothing out of it as he wasn’t drinking, and the girl was more interested in me and her boyfriend! He spent a fortune that night, close to £100, and back in the 80’s that was a lot of money to spend on a night out!

We made him buy us drinks all night, and laughed at him every time he went to the bogs. It got so bad even the bar staff were laughing at him.

The upshot was that the bar staff kept all the bottles we drank that night on a shelf near the ceiling of the bar, they’re still there now, and the twat, he did have leukemia. None of us felt bad as he was a complete twunt!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 15:05, Reply)