Pearoast:
My 7 year old freaked out the Witnesses once...
She had a pet snake (rosy boa, quite small and harmless) named Syrup. We bought her in winter and as it is amazingly cold in Michigan then she moved like well, molasses in January. Syrup loved to curl around your neck, slide through your warm hair and perch on the top of your ear, looking out at the world. Emma was wearing Syrup in such a manner when the doorbell rang. She opened the door to two of the most horrified looks I've seen in a long time. The lead Witness gaped and stammered at the devil-child, "D-d-do you k-know the Word of the L-lord?'


I couldn't resist. I came up behind her, put my hand on her head with a suitably theatric gesture, made psycho-eyes and hissed, "GET OUT!"



They didn't run. I give them credit for bravery but they did walk very quickly down the driveway.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 0:57, 3 replies)

Hahaha
Awesome. I'll have to try that next time.
(Dante licked your nipple on, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 3:44, closed)

Yeah
I can see why they'd like to get away relatively quickly from yet another infantile display of fake satanism.
(haberman is singing in the changes, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 14:17, closed)

It WAS infantile
I freely admit. Oddly enough, I don't mind the Mormons so much-you can talk to them, they can finesse a discussion and usually they are devoting a year of their life to getting doors slammed in their faces. Even if I don't want to talk, I tell them to come back if they are cold or tired or hungry or just need a piss; my house is open to them.

But Witnesses? Man, I have yet to meet one that isn't smug, self-righteous and deaf to any exploration of the concepts they are espousing. They just come out and fart around pestering people for 3 hourts.
There have to be some cool ones out there, but they haven't shown up at my door yet.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 16:56, closed)