The wanderer
When I'm really pissed I have a habit of waking in the night and staggering on autopilot to the toilet (none of these pissing in wardrobe antics for me, no siree). However once I've emptied my bladder the autopilot shuts down and abandons me to my fate. This has resulted in me waking up hours later in the toilet/bathroom/hallway/living room . . anywhere.

One night our son (aged 10) had a sleep over with 3 of his mates. Whilst they were all amusing themselves doing Wii etc in one room, the wife and I stayed in the other room getting pissed. At some point all the youngsters went to bed in the same bedroom. To facilitate this we had put a sofa bed in there on which two were sleeping.

Following so far ?

Anyway at some point in the night my piss autopilot activated and off I must have gone. The first I knew of this is when, at first light, I woke up, stark bollock naked, lying curled up at the foot of a sofa bed in which two youngsters were sleeping. I got up and retreated to my own bed.

What the fuck would have happened if I hadn't been the first to wake ? I can just imagine little some child going back to his dad saying "we found X's dad in bed with us and he had no clothes on"
(Bitter and Twisted, Fri 7 Jan 2011, 21:15, 1 reply)

Perhaps
it was the alcohol? It does the same to me (and I don't mean getting blind drunk either, a couple of pints will disturb my sleep patterns)
(Rsoles, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 16:25, closed)