How I nearly gave my dad a golden shower.
A few years ago I was staying at the parents over summer and trying to earn some cash for the next year of university. I was working evenings as a potwash. A year of fucked up sleep patterns and boozing meant I'd usually come home and have a couple of beers whilst watching telly or dicking about on the internet.

My dad suffers quite badly from migraines, as the weather changes he can have a fortnight of frequent migraines that result in him sitting around holding his head. I occasionally get them but not to the degree he does. Now, what people with migraines will tell you is that after the visuals your head fucking canes; the pain experienced is somewhat photosensitive, so it's quite common to feel sorry for yourself in a darkened room.

It was about 2am when I decided I should go for a piss before heading to bed, Since I hate having to get up in the night. I quietly made my way to the bathroom, too lazy to turn on the light I just barged in and started my 'whip the cock out whilst approaching the bog routine' I'm shuffling forward with my had in my gruds when all of a sudden my hand bumps into the balding dome of my fathers head. "Arghhh!" I exclam, "pffffft" he says. He was lucky he was sitting forward, since I was a gnats bollock away from having it out and pissing where I thought the bog was.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Sun 1 Mar 2009, 14:17, Reply)