It did look bad, really. . .
My husband is a licensed massage/bodywork therapist. NO, not that kind of massage!

At the spa where he works, the various staff members serve as test subjects whenever a fellow employee is learning a new treatment, such as a seaweed wrap or body scrub or whatnot.

One day, my husband was scheduled to be the guinea pig for one of the newer hires. We're quite good friends now, but she didn't know me very well at the time.

The day before, the cat had jumped on my sleeping husband and scratched the hell out of his back, leaving him with red welts all over his skin.
My husband is a very calm, quiet person. He also has his nipples pierced, though he apparently 'doesn't look the type' to have such an adornment.

During the course of her practise body treatment, his new co-worker notices his nipple rings plus the welts on his back, adds it up and thinks to herself 'So that's what things are like at their house!'.

After she got to know me well, she confessed wondering if he and I had some BDSM thing going on and if my slightly Gothy appearance was hinting at me being some kind of freaky dominatrix type. I was almost embarrassed to admit that our (quite lovely) sex life is actually rather basic.

Our poor friend has a knack for attracting the pervs, though -- in the past two months, she's gone out on dates with two different guys, both of whom looked and acted totally normal. Guy 1 later admitted to being into golden showers and Guy 2 told her he was turned on by pregnant women. Fortunately, this information was revealed to her before any compromising positions were attained.
(louveciennes , Volvospotter, Fri 18 Aug 2006, 20:11, Reply)