Que?
I recently met up with a friend in London for a day of annoying the populous and generally having fun. Inbetween locations we played a favorite game of ours, "Shashu" in which you go up to a member of the public, say, "Have you seen the shashu?" or "You dropped your shashu!" or something similar. If they look down you get a point and the first to fifty wins.
My friend went up to one particularly dim woman and said,
"Excuse me, miss."
"Yes?"
"Can I interest you in the shashu?" *Points down*
"I'm sorry, I don't speak German."

I'm teaching my grandad to use his PC and it's more than a little frustrating. Some of our most memorable conversations have been:

Hold in mind he has SEEN DDR as I actually got him to do upgrades with my supervision a few times

"I play it [UT2K4] for about half an hour fine but after that it goes all jumpy."
"Probably a memory leak."
*Sulking* "We should just throw it away, it's no good if it's leaking."

After several hundered attempts to explain to him that bugs, viruses and hardware failures are three wildly different things...

"I keep getting this blue screen and then it all turns off."
*I examine* "Looks like a serious hardware failure" (It was the PSU that went on to fry the innards)
"But I have a virus scanner!"

"The game dies after this point and I have to restart."
"Sounds like a bug with the game. I'll see if there's a patch."
"But I've got a virus scanner!"

"I can't get to my email."
*Inspects - network cable to router buggered* "Looks like this cable has been damaged."
"What good is my virus scanner if it can't prevent that?"

You get the idea.

A classic on my behalf:
My aunt (Chavette): "I'd like to change the national anthem to Jerusalem."
Me: "What does that have to do with England?"
(Gah, brain-in-gear-first, Chris!)
(Guineapiggy Fuzzeh!, Wed 12 Jan 2005, 2:10, Reply)