I hurt my rude bitsSpent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
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rob, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
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Life's little instruction bookI've a bad habit of disobeying life's unwritten instructions. You know the sort? Along the lines of "Don't attempt to eat this giraffe"?
I'm fairly sure there's one that states, "While using a steam iron, be sure to wear pants."
I prepared for work one day, disregarding this rule, and sure enough when I decided a collar needed an extra burst of steam, OW OW OW BURNS TO THE GROIN, OW, 6 AM Australian Eastern Standard Time. I had to wear waist high pants -- and plenty of soft, medicated dressings-- to work for the next week. But the first thing I did was SMS a best mate to tell him what I'd done.
He replied to my anguished sms with:
"It is with great trepidation I say that I always thought you had a hot pussy."
(This response is similar to one I've submitted previously in the Unwritten Instructions QOTW)
(, Sun 16 Jul 2006, 4:09, Reply)
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