I hurt my rude bitsSpent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
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rob, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
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Football injuriesThe problem with being a goalkeeper is the tendency to occasionally have someone hit a football very hard into your bollocks or becoming entwined with a goalpost. However the most memorable save I've made with my testicle(s)was during a game for the school where we were getting humped.
Their left winger plays a throughball which our right back manages to miss by slipping and falling like Peter Crouch standing in viscous dog shit. The striker is clean through, he's already scored twice, so he's on a hatrick. I come out and narrow the angle and he runs right up to me and toe-pokes it. I get down quickly and save it at the expense of very painful bollocks.
Unfortunately the ball cannoned off mine and off the knee of a defender who was running back and went in the top corner.
If only we could pass the ball as quickly as that.
Oh and a dog once bit me on the arse.
(, Mon 17 Jul 2006, 0:32, Reply)
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