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This is a question I Hurt My Rude Bits, Again

My commute to work was made excellent the other day when I saw a motorcyclist try to ride on the pavement to avoid a traffic queue, lose control, fall off and land bollock-first on a concrete bollard. He was fine, eventually – but tell us your tales of the old blinding agony to the gentleman's or gentlewoman's area.

(, Thu 7 Mar 2013, 12:50)
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Slip 'n' slide
During a lovely drunken summer afternoon myself and some friends were having a competition to see who could travel furthest on a slip 'n' slide. I was doing well but someone beat my record and, deciding that this simply wouldn't do, took an irresponsible run up and dive to gain maximum momentum. Unfortunately my balls decided to reposition themselves while I was flying through the air to just beneath my right thigh. Upon impact with the ground my right bollock was pancaked between the floor and my leg. I was in agony for some time, everyone else laughed.

Bastards.

There is video here:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=-T_4VGmFoIw&t=1m51s
(, Wed 13 Mar 2013, 17:42, 3 replies)
There's literally nothing worse than shameless porkers.

(, Wed 13 Mar 2013, 18:44, closed)
Oi!
Don't talk about his missus like that.
(, Wed 13 Mar 2013, 18:47, closed)
Umm.
I'm a shameless porker.

Needed more flab down the slide.
Once a season I do a "slide session" on some black plastic with water and detergent for my daughters Tee-ball team (I'm the coach, don'tch know!)
Watching me do a bellyflop after all the kids have had a couple of turns is a sight to see, let me tell you.

Might need to put up or shut up now.
(, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 6:15, closed)

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