Tit & Tears
Me and my older sister constantly bickered & fought through our childhood although never getting to the stage of needing hospital treatment.
The last time we really fought (me about 15 and her about 18) i learned some new and interesting facts about the female body and how it deals with pain.
An ordinary argument culminated in me punching her as hard as I could on her left breast (I don't think i necessarily aimed for the left one, just happened to hit it). Next thing I know she was releasing the most piercing scream I have ever heard. How the windows and glass ornaments didn't explode I'll never know. The odd thing was that after the initial scream she sat on the sofa blubbing away quietly for about 40 mins until my parents came home at which point (strangely coinciding with my parents opening the front door) she once again emitted her harpy scream. I can only compare the quiet blubbing and massive screaming with the noises of a racing car. The blubbing as if the engine is idling and the scream is the same as just before the lights go out at a Formula One race start.
I still don't know what way her nerves are organised but it seems there is a nerve motorway and nerve b-road from the female breast to the female brain. This explains the initial scream (motorway) and the 40 minute gap to the secondary scream (b-road). This explanation makes me happier than the thought that she was sitting there with crocadile tears for 40 minutes waiting on my parents to get home so I'd get into trouble. That would make her a truly evil bitch.
( sneep used to date Freddie Starr's hamster, Fri 19 Aug 2005, 13:06, Reply)