One of my earliest memories...
My brother did this to me. He set up an elaborate race though the house and ending in the bedroom. He ran it and I timed him, then I ran it.

While I was running around the house, he set up some fishing line in the doorway of the bedroom at what he thought would be chest level.

I came running down the hall at full speed, turned the last corner and WHAM! - fishing line right across the throat! This caused me to also fall back and slam my head on the floor.

It's the only time he showed any concern - he would have been killed if Mom and Dad found out.
( Art101 You all have an unhealthy and morbid fascination, Tue 23 Aug 2005, 3:46, Reply)

screen doors
One time at my grandparents my yonger brother about 6 at the time was running round the house and yelling. I got annoyed and as he tried to run into the garden i closed the sliding screen doors shut as he approached, being an idiot he didnt stop ran face first into the glass and fell backwards concussed.
(Haggard, Tue 23 Aug 2005, 2:13, Reply)

chisel injury
After one particularly vicious altercation with my little sister, one sunny afternoon back in the early eighties, I settled the matter by innocently throwing a cardboard box at her which had a rather sharp chisel sticking out of the bottom. She still has a big scar on her leg.

I also once knocked a cousin out using a cast iron bath and a pram, but that really is another story.
(toble Top Quality Lurker, Tue 23 Aug 2005, 1:37, Reply)

I can't answer this question
seeing as I have no siblings anymore.
They all had an unfortunate accident were very clumsy never existed at all.
Honest John's Secondhand Cars!
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 23 Aug 2005, 0:40, Reply)

Cold Ambition
Me and my sister (4 and 3 respectively) were in the kitchen upsupervised. In the freezer were some lovely ice pops. I know we had to ask for an ice pop, but instead, I ask my little sister to get one out, preparing the "She got it out" defense if rumbled!
For some reason she had wet hands, can't remember why, but as she reached into the back of the freezer, her hand was magically sucked to the bottom and stuck fast. I tried pulling her out, then my mother came running when she heard my sister's frantic cries. Much pulling and yanking later, she was free but her hand was two times as large with huge blisters from the frost burn! She had to go to hospital and wore a bandage for a month or so. Don't know why she complained though, she got smarties for being good for the doctor and I didn't get my bloody ice pop!!!
(spuggie, Tue 23 Aug 2005, 0:06, Reply)

Plastic Egg Machines - You know, the orange ones on walls....
I thought that telling my four year old sister to stick her hand in the machine as I turned the dial on the front was good so she could grab more free toys.
Unfortunately, her hand got stuck inside.
The fire brigade and paramedics were called. She was stuck for hours. I blamed her, I was only 10 or so....They nearly amputated her hand to free her, her circulation had got so bad. Luckily she was freed. It even made the national papers, albeit a small space.
She's gay now. I'll always wonder if it was my fault or natural selection....
(iluvtehfluffeh, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 23:46, Reply)

Injured Siblings
My brother sat on my chest and pulled out one of my teeth with a pair of pliers. This was so we could get 10p from the tooth fairy. I think I was soft enough to give him his half.
(Nemesis, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 23:41, Reply)

On the school bus with my bro...
He being 3 years younger than me at the time (I was either 15 or 16, I don't remember) and he was always daring me to do stuff. This one day I had managed to get some masking tape from Graphics (as you do) and he reckoned I wouldn't dare tape his head with it.

It was 2 miles later when he finally disentangled the tape from around his head, and hands, and the pole on the bus, and walked home, that he tried to beat me up.

He failed.

Apologies for nothing.
(The Wigmeister, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 23:18, Reply)

Older Brother
Decided he liked wrestling, and did a 'Piledriver' on concrete.

I have many lumps on my head from different occasions. Do hope I don't go bald...
( Vintage The badgers took my sanity... and my TV, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 22:59, Reply)

Guy at school
Shagged his sister.

Don't know if that counts as the 'worst'. Maybe the weirdest.
(Pachey, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 22:21, Reply)

Dive from the bed!!!
My brother had a top bunk bed, and he decided to let me jump off it and he should have caught me.

Seeing as I was young and obviously not heavy I thought I'd be funny to jump off and land my feet straight onto his chest, knocking him straight onto the floor on his back. I think I winded him pretty badly as he couldn't find the enerjy to get up to chase me out the room.

Hey I was only young ;)
(Lezarel, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 22:01, Reply)

The meanest brother alive
Advent beatings. Need I say more? Christmas eve was a frightening place in my house.
(HelloSailor, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 21:10, Reply)

tame, compared to most of the others but...
i was about 4, my brother 1... breakfast time one lovely summers morning. i was sat at the kitchen table with my mum and my brother was in his high chair next to me.

the doorbell rings and my mum goes to answer, saying 'watch your brother a minute'.

she came back into the room about 2 minutes later to find me reading the back of a cereal packet and my brother, having somehow liberated himself from his high chair, had shifted a chair from under the table and placed it up against the fridge freezer. he'd then climbed onto the chair and retrieved the superglue tube from the top of the fridge, opened it and started to dine on the lovely sticky contents.

cue a day of me at a neighbours house, and my mum spending the day at the hospital having my brother checked out. he was ok fortunately...

years later, in the car on the way to wherever we were going on holiday. i was 16, him 13. after an offhand, snidey comment on my behalf, he swung his fist round in a half hearted way and caught me PERFECTLY on the elbow, hitting a nerve or something... it caused me to double up in pain, loose every ounce of breathe in my body, dry heave and when my dad finally pulled into a layby to see what the fuss was, i couldnt walk... i'll never forget that. agony.

legnth is just an illusion...
(mister loonatik, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 19:49, Reply)

o.o
This is, suprisingly, rather recent. Also known as- yesterday.
My (also) teenaged sister decided that, for a bit of sport, she'd see how mad she could make me. The problem is, I have a mild mental issue that when I get mad, I throw things, swear, and occasionally will go on a small hysterical, homicidal rampage.
She finds it funny.
She proceeded to wind me up, make a huge mess, force ME to clean up the mess, and insult me while doing so.
I called her a hog.
She hit me. Hard.
And... given the circumstances, and knowing me, I fought back. With whatever was at hand. Since I was doing the dishes, it was a frying pan and a small, sharp potato peeler.
...
Do the math yourself, fellow B3tans. And apologies for length.
(( She's sitting in the back room watching TV, one hand swathed in bandages, and I might have possibly scarred the left side of her face permanently. Serves her right.))
(ZooLurker is an angry chick with a mullet!, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 19:49, Reply)

When I was wee,
my 2 older brothers shut me in a suitcase and threw me down the stairs. Cunts!
(Pedro-a-Go-Go, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 18:50, Reply)

the story goes something like this
or so i'm told

I'm about two weeks old.... phone rings so my mum goes to answer it.

So far so good - mum comes back to find her new born with blood dripping from his mouth... Unable to locate the source of the bleeding, i'm put in the car when my brother suddenly announces that it *might* have something to do with the red smartie he just gave me because i 'looked hungry'

Turns out it was red food dye all along.

Apologies for length, but hey i'm only 2 weeks old ok??
(well its not going to suck itself yadda yadda yadda, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 18:48, Reply)

Sisters a Nutter,
When I was about 3 months my sister (at the time was about 3) stabbed me with a carving knife in the chest.

My mum was in the kitchen at the time and could hear me scremming, she came out to see what was going on to see my sister with blood on her hands and a carving knife. She asked what happened to which my sister replied "I stuck it in him". Ahh sweet.
(Andrew Gilfrin, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 17:44, Reply)

Well
I managed to give my sister a black eye two days before our family holiday to Italy, though that was an accident. I had a stick over one shoulder, turned around and smacked her with it, though since all of this happened behind me I couldn't really be blamed.

However, when we were in the back of the car on holiday and she was going on an on about how she had never had a nosebleed, and I was only to happy to oblige and punched her in the face...yeah, that was my fault. She still tells people about it now...
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 17:26, Reply)

Done all sorts
can't remember many of them, but i do recall playing 'pass the football' when he was about two, i was 6, so i threw the ball at him as hard as i could, giving him a broken nose.
The one which will always be my favourite is when we got our first wheelie bin. He said 'hey, push me around in it', so he climbed in.

Hes too small to get out of it so i closed the lid, put a brick on top and left him there all day. About six hours later my mum asked where he was, i just sniggered and she legged it down the garden to find him shouting from the confines of a brown wheelie bin!
( Bobson I who milks the milkmen?, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 16:44, Reply)

I'm not a cunt, honest.
Asides from providing me with regular beatings and ritual humilation, my older brother served just one truely great purpose of supplying me with tremendous laughs due to his mong-like tendancy to cripple himself at every given oppurtunity.

Like the time he decided to form a small explosive device using a stone, caps, sellotape and SHARDS OF A COAT HANGER. I'm not sure how long it took them to remove that piece of metal out of his eye. To his credit, he'd "thought it'd gone out".

I also remember him trying to prove they he could dive right through the leylandii that bordered our garden. So after strolling around to the other side to see how he'd fared, how else was I meant to respond to the sight of him sticking out the other side from the shoulders up, complete with a bit of tree in his neck and blood coughing up from his mouth; I almost pissed myself with laughter.

Finally, I remember the time I was finally sick of all the countless times of bullying attacks, so my mate and I eventually saw red and attacked back, pushing him over and throwing nearby garden objects on to him - toy chairs, bikes and the like. We stopped by the time the pile got half a metre high and the legs poking out from the bottom had stopped writhing. I guess it was a little harsh, but it had been 5 years in the making.

Hmm, rereading this post it seems like *I'm* the bastard. I'm not, you know, the guy was an utter shit! At least a laughter came from it too.

Sorry for length and whatnot.
(metalgearal, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 16:38, Reply)

Mental cruellness
My brother and I have always been mean to our younger sister, she is a fair bit younger than we are (i'm 27, shes just turned 20) and for YEARS we had been planning mean things to do to her boyfriends when she finally started bringing them home.. Seriously, we'd been laughing about the stuff we were going to do since we were about 20, and her 13..

Fast forwarad a couple of years and she comes back from first term at university at christmas and she has got herself a boyfriend. Now bear in mind we have been winding her up for a good couple of years about what we are going to do when she gets a boyfriend, and she is properly worried about us meeting her.

We've been winding her up about adjusting her bed so make the bolts squeek during the night if there is any movement (her bedroom is next to parents room), and other such meanness.

We made her cry in the end 'cause she was so worried about it.

Christ we're cunts..
Turned out we didn't really do anything at all, just sat on each side of him on the sofa, far far too close and stared at him during the advert breaks in any show.
Also never offered him any food apart from beans and bread (not even toast).

Oh, and had a conversation about 'fucking our sister' and what we would do if he treated her wrong..

It was FUCKING hard not to laugh - brother and I aren't partcually hard or anything.

Nice lad actually - she had clearly warned him we were gonna be cunts, and dealt with it without being TOO fucked up.

Didn't last though, the slag went off with someone else. Slut.
(grr_boy, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 15:47, Reply)

My little sister
was pissing me right off one day, you know the old repeating everthing I said.

So I gouged her eyes out with a souldering iron, and fucked the empty sockets.

We're best of friends now though.
( The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 15:33, Reply)

Andy on the ockey... or maybe not.
Yes, one day when I was ten me and my brother Andy decided to play a hilarious game whereby we stand at one end of the field behind our home (well, okay, mobile home) and throw darts at each other. No, not paper darts, or flea darts (y'know, those grass heads full of black nits that you pull up and chuck at people, especially if they are wearing a woolly jumper), but real bona-fide ONE HUNDRED AND EEIIIIGGGHHTEEEEEEE darts. I think the idea was to dodge the darts, but my younger brother, in his infinite 8 year old wisdom, decided to pretend to be a walking dartboard and strolled head first into the direction of a dart I had thrown at some velocity. It embedded into the side of his head. Oh deep joy... was I in for it now. Of course he went wailing off to Mum. Thankfully on close inspection it turned out to be merely a fleshwound. But I was sent swiftly to bed without any supper. Which wasn't so bad as it was boiled ham, lumpy mash and cold bullet-hard garden peas. Again.

***SIBLING SADISM UPDATE***

Blimey, I spent the past half-hour since posting this darts story reading what others have done to their dear little brothers and sisters and even though I'm only on the 2nd page I've come across 5 or so stories also involving darts. What a sadistic bunch of, er, sadists we are!

Perhaps this QOTW should be renamed to "What's the worst you've done to your siblings, with darts?"

..
(martianrobot, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 15:30, Reply)

Torturing
I remember torturing my younger brother with a daily chinese burn (holding his forarm with both hands and twisting in opposite directions) how he used to look forward to that.
And pinning him to the floor with his head trapped between my knees whilst dangling a 'snotty greeny' above his face untill it swung like a pendulum above his face and sucking it back in. Inevitably it would break and land on his face.

Then he grew up - He now punches me as hard as he can on the upper arm everytime I see him - he's 31!
(Axe murderer, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 15:28, Reply)

My older sister was always beating the living crap out of me,
I used to get home from school and lock myself in the bathroom for fear of batterings. Once I pushed her down the stairs and made her cry, seemed like a momentous acheivement at the time!

For the record, I'm now 2ft taller than her and we're best of mates.
( Damien's Hearse, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 15:22, Reply)

Stabby
In about 1960, my (now departed) uncle tried to stab his big brother (my dad) with an 18" WW1 bayonet. Another time when they were younger, my dad threw my uncle out of a 1st floor window, backwards. By sheer mad luck he landed on his feet. They didn't really get on.
( Normanator Bad case of trapped wind since, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 14:40, Reply)

'lil bro
my brother is 4 years younger than me, and although the time for vicious bouts of pain has passed, over the years his misplaced admiration of his 'Big Bro' have (these few spring to mind)resulted me in;

us going to asda with my nan, going to the freezer cabinet, pulling a frozen turkey from within and telling the then 7 year old to punch it as hard as he can. (he did!) Result - Fractured fingers

pinning him to the floor when he pissed me off, which he was laughing about which infuriated me further, que me grabbing his foot, using it as a lever with which to smash his knee into his face. Result - Broken nose

Parents on holiday, im 'responsible' for anything happening to him - hes 16! I come back to find hes thrown an impromptu party, house is full of his mates, hes taken my mums car and is pissed up. and hes not passed his test. When he gets back i hawl him out, have a shouting match, which he gets cocky in front of a houseful of his mates, and i spark him out with one punch. Result - bruised cheekbones and humiliation. (ironically even though he is my 'little brother' genetic unfairness meant he inherited the height, so was a foot taller than me)

and my favourite

when wheelie bins were 'invented' (?)he was about 8, telling him to get in so we could have 'fun' with me pushing him around - i closed the lid, pushed it into the far reaches of our garden, and under the branch of a waiting tree. Result - Claustrophobia to this day


I got my come uppance howver, as he waited in hiding for me when i was not expecting him, and he wound up the biggest kick to my bollocks i have ever received.
(balboa, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 14:01, Reply)

My sister punched me...
and broke three fingers.

well, it made me laugh..
(tickles, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 13:53, Reply)

whoops
Me, my mate and my younger brother were dragged along to a christmas party for the patients at the local hospital, by my mates sister who was a nurse. Why? Don't ask!

We found great entertainment racing around the corridors and car parks in wheel chairs. (I was 12!) My brothers stay at the hospital finished-up being for two weeks - I pushed him in a wheelchair down a very steep hill and let go. Gathering speed fast and heading onto a main road he decided to jump at the last moment thinking it would be better to hit the tarmac than being squashed by a car - he broke his leg and lost his front teeth!
(Axe murderer, Mon 22 Aug 2005, 13:07, Reply)