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This is a question "Needless to say, I had the last laugh"

Celebrity autobiographies are filled to the brim with self-righteous tales of smug oneupmanship. So, forget you had any shame, grab a coffee and a croissant, and tell us your smug tales of when you got one over somebody.

Thanks to Ring of Fire for the suggestion

(, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 12:55)
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i used to work late
nights at a call in the city centre of manchester. because of where i lived, if it was a friday night, i'd get a taxi back home, instead instead of the danger-bus.

On a cold miserable, winters friday night at about 11ish, i was knackered and in foul form but I was the only person waiting at the taxi rank so i cheered myself with thought of being home soon

I had been waiting about 10 minutes when the taxi pulled up.
At exactly the same moment a drunken girly "woo taxi" from the other side of the street. she pulled her harassed boyfriend, dashed across the road and jumped in.

I unpolitely suggested they get out of my taxi but the boyfriend gave me a sheepish grin and said "girls, tsk"
My years of education bubbled forth "go fuck yourself" i spat

so I had resigned myself to a cold wait, when from stage left entered
the hardest looking man i have ever seen. Not big and burly, but short, wirey, scarred and mean, but looking very smart in his luminous green Taxi Marshall coat.

"was that your taxi, Sir" he asked
"yes, it was" i said, sounding like someone being rescued from a mugging by superman.
"taxi driver. Don't pull out" he commanded and the taxi didnt move
"you two out now" he said to the passengers. it had that calm tone that suggested if they didnt there'd be years of orthodontic bills to be paid.

the girl protested loudly but her boyfriend valued his teeth and dragged her out.

I felt like Royalty getting in that taxi. I thanked the Taxi Marshall profusely and went home in a warm glow. laughing last.
(, Fri 4 Feb 2011, 12:47, 2 replies)
Taxi Marshall's sound awesome
Never heard of 'em before!
(, Fri 4 Feb 2011, 13:55, closed)
Depends how its done
round here, the taxi marshalls are employed by one of the local firms. The result is that, in the street where it's traditionally been considered the safest and most convenient to get a taxi, you can no longer get one unless you use taxis by the firm employing the marshalls. I personally refuse to use them on account of them being overcharging cunts, so I have to cross a duel carriageway to get to an alternative pickup point.

They're also utterly useless when it comes to actually doing their jobs. I've seen a crowd of them stood watching people fighting over a taxi, and when the police have turned up and asked why they didn't intervene, or at least radio the police themselves, they just spouted "elf'n'safety,innit"
(, Fri 4 Feb 2011, 16:01, closed)

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