Why I was late"On the way to the station, I got hit by a bat, it almost took my head clean off. Then the machine would not accept my ticket and the guy at the gate didn't think I looked like the photo on my travel card. So I had to go home and get my passport.
Then the train was 45 minutes late to the station because of the dangerous badger threat at Carpenters Park.
When I was on the train it took and hour and a half to get past the biscuit factory because the driver was really fat.
Then there was a delay stopping at the station because the train in front had heard we were coming and decided to play a practical joke with a rubber shoe on the track.
That is why I couldn't get here on time today."
What's your best excuse?
(
chthonic, Thu 28 Jun 2007, 10:36)
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Philosophy Mid-termBack during my drugging days, a friend of mine and I decided to go get real high before our Philosophy mid-term. We ended up driving around town for a while before stopping in this quiet little neighborhood to blaze up.
Three bowls into it, this incredibly old lady walks outside of her house to water the lawn. My buddy slaps my arm and points, saying, "Dude, holy crap."
It turns out, this old lady has like, the most freakishly long arms I've ever seen in my life. They are almost literally dragging on the ground as she walks. Watching this lady water her lawn was one of the funniest things we'd ever seen (being high at the time), so we just sat there and laughed as she did her lawn chores.
When she finally went back inside, we realized that we'd totally missed the start of our test, so we ran to class as quickly as we could. Stumbling into the classroom, the rest of the class feverishly working on the mid-term, we had to approach the professor, bleary eyed, to pick up our tests. He shoots me this malevolent glare and hisses, "Why are you boys late," as he hands me the test paper.
Too high to lie, I simply responded, "Dude, we would've been on time, but there was this old lady with incredibly long arms. That's why we're late."
My friend and I both got A's on the test.
(, Fri 29 Jun 2007, 7:08, Reply)
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