Why I was late"On the way to the station, I got hit by a bat, it almost took my head clean off. Then the machine would not accept my ticket and the guy at the gate didn't think I looked like the photo on my travel card. So I had to go home and get my passport.
Then the train was 45 minutes late to the station because of the dangerous badger threat at Carpenters Park.
When I was on the train it took and hour and a half to get past the biscuit factory because the driver was really fat.
Then there was a delay stopping at the station because the train in front had heard we were coming and decided to play a practical joke with a rubber shoe on the track.
That is why I couldn't get here on time today."
What's your best excuse?
(
chthonic, Thu 28 Jun 2007, 10:36)
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Gimp Maskspent 2 years in a job constantly being late because I found it very easy to sleep right through an alarm... also had very bad memory and concentration levels.
anyway after serveral unofficial warnings, a couple of official ones my employment was haging by a thread so to speak, and along with much nagging from the missus about VERY loud snoring, i paid a visit to my docs, and was referred to specialist who gave me some cool equipment to do some home testing while I sleep...
reading the data from the machines next day the specialist immediatly diagnosed "obstructive sleep apneoa" where I stop breathing upto 400-500 times a night buggering up sleep patterns and brain function.. (read memory and concentration) and he booked an in 2 days appointment to be fitted with a pressure mask and air pump machine to use as I sleep. The masks are awful things, looks like full fire department 'BA' gear with forehead rests, multi link straps big hose coming from it (google image search for 'CPAP MASK'
for this appointment I took the whole day off, i hadn't told my boss my condition at this point however i had once again been late the day before and the boss was in a bad mood, so just after arriving home from my mask fitting i get a call from him demading I be in his office in 30 minutes for a disaplinary meeting (quite possibly the last me thinks) ... i told him i'd be an hour cuz i was an hour away (lies) and used the spare time I had to make a few cardboard cut out attachments for the mask... dig out the camoflage cream and combat jacket from old war games/paintball events..
i thundered into his office in all this get up and the look on his face was priceless... i think he was a little scared until he recognised me.. then i took the mask off and explained the situation showed him medical references and letters... the sacking was cancelled.. but he left the warnings in place becuase I "should have done something about it sooner" twunt... i left 3 weeks later...
length ? it comes with 3 metres of hose
(, Wed 4 Jul 2007, 15:54, Reply)
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