My own death
When I was about 10 or 11 my class at school was encouraged to get a penfriend in Africa. It was organized through some charity, and the idea was to make us more culturally aware, or something. So I ended up writing to some boy around my age in Nigeria.

It started off quite interesting and fun, we sent photos of ourselves and shared information about schools, but after a while I ran out of things to say, and he started asking if I would send shoes, or money, or help him get to school in Britain. I felt embarassed about this. So I faked my own death. I didn't write for a couple of months, then I sent a letter, trying to disguise my handwriting, explaining how I was Smale's dad, and Smale had tragically died in a road accident so he wouldn't be able to write anymore, ok? Bye.

But my penfriend wrote back, expressing his sadness, and asking for more details. Stupidly I couldn't resist elaborating on the road accident. So then he wrote back again, asking for a photo, to remember me by. So I sent one, and thanked him for his concern, and we exchanged a few more letters, but finally the correspondence faded away.

But then the charity who organised the thing in the first place decided that they would arrange some exchange visits with our school. They wrote to the head mistress. They expressed their sadness at my untimely death. The headmistress called me into her office. "You're looking well Smale," she said when I went in, "considering you died 6 months ago."
(Smale is stuffed, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 13:23, 4 replies)

Brilliant
*click*
(McChinaman banned, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 13:50, closed)

Nice
*Clicks*
(mon bison powered by magnets, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 14:54, closed)

Winner!

(Jugular, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 19:29, closed)

Did he help your Dad get the £30,000,000 left from your estate out of the UK?
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 19:51, closed)