I'm sure some of these have been done but...
...oh well.
I go to 6th form in a town called Witney, and occasionaly we glimpse a bloke dubbed variously as "Hotpants Man" or "That Wierd Alchy Bloke". He's about 50 looking, with crazy white hair, and can be found wondering around dressed in shiney blue hotpants and a leapard print waist coat (undone, with nothing underneath) regardless of the weather. He's also ussualy got at least one bottle of spirits on him. He enjoys sitting near bus stops waving cheerily with his bottle and giving people thumbs-up. Last time I saw him he was shooting passengers on a passing bus with his fingers in a good natured sort of way.
That was a few monthes ago... maybe the heavy rain killed him.

A few people have already mentioned "Colonal Mustard" who enjoys "dancing" on the streets of Oxford with his big hat. A while back a mate had a similer floppy top hat (a Guinness one, no less) and so decided to join in the dancing. The Colonal seemed pretty pleased.

One time me and some mates were hanging around in the Westgate shopping centre in Oxford and a tramp-looking old bloke wondered past, and said something which sounded like "mnar phrump ta da da gog?" to which I wisely replied "urh?". He didn't seem to notice, and procided to walk past the rest of us (we were slouching on a wall) muttering similer questions to them as well, before ambling away.

A while back at work (I'm a shelf stacker at Somerfield - woo!) a mid-40s looking woman started alternatively commenting on the designs on the bean cans, and musing at if the price was fair. There was a bloke stood next to her so I pressumed he was a relative/friend/hubby who was belatadly putting up with the bollocks-talk. However, she then walked off, still muttering, and the bloke turned to give me a "What the fuck was that all about?" type look.

Once while on the way to a gig at the Zodiac down Cowley Road, me and some friends passed (at a wary distance) a man wearing a bright green and yellow pixie-looking suit (complete with zig zagged tunic) and what appeared to be flower in his hair. After passing him we sped up considerably.

After a night out once we were all getting the bus back (double decker stagecoach) and an old alchy/tramp type was sat at the back, loudly talking away about everything and nothing, and declaring how "shite! fuckin' shite!" everything was. When he got off the bus, he gave every person he passed a drunkenly slurred "burbhye!" so one of my friends replied with a similarly slurred "noice meetin' ya matey!" which he didn't take very kindly to. He was still mumbling and swearing at her as he got off the bus and it pulled away. Thank fuck he didn't get back on.

Finally, theres a bus driver (we recently discovered his name is Barry) who seems to have some deep hatred of students/old people/anyone with a bus pass as whenever we get on the bus and show him our passes, he pulls a revolted looking face and looks out of the window instead, where he continues looking untill anyone with a pass has gone by. A mate once decided to stand there until he looked at her (which he didnt) before shouting "hellooooo?" at him, which earned her a split second glance.
How this man still has a job I'll never know.

Oh yeah, first time poster, long time lurker :p
(Anonymous Coward, Thu 16 Sep 2004, 17:49, Reply)