I feel that I have to mention
the very pale people who congreate at the bottom of Union Street in Maidstone. I'll point out now that they're not strictly mad, just, er, devout.
Sometimes, they are just two, pale women, other times there are more of them, all pale, mostly frail, men and women.
They stand on one side of the road (outside the Christian Bookshop), facing the other, and pray, very quietly, whilst one of them holds up a faded picture of the Virgin Mary.
First time I saw them, I was really rather freaked out (it was just the two women) and made may way quickly past them. The second time, when the whole gang was there, I stopped to gawp at them, and realised what they were doing: they're standing opposite the Marie Stopes centre and praying for the souls of the aborted. Pretty intimidating for anyone entering or leaving Marie Stopes, I would imagine, especially as watching them makes you wonder if you've gone deaf (their mouths move, but you have to get really close to hear what they are saying). One day I might point out to them that, whilst Marie Stopes is infront of them, there's a funeral home behind them (next to the bookshop).
I've also spotted the two, wandering around town at the weekends, Virgin Mary held out in front, praying (for everyone's souls?) in their usual, sub-audible manner.

There's also two me (used to be just the one) who set up a stall outside Marks & Spencer, shouting to all and sundry that we are sinners, and are dammned and will go to hell. I'm not quite sure why they do this, as no one has ever (to my knowledge) stopped to read their signs or take one of their leaflets. Mostly, they just make small children cry.

Whilst I'm at it, I might aswell mention the Maidstone tramp who looks almost identical to Bill Maynard's Greengrass character from Heartbeat (same hat, same beard, same scarf, same coat, same face). A harmless old duffer, been around for years, he would stagger about the town, clutching his brown paper bag, muttering to himself. Tried (unsuccessfully) to pick a fight with a friend of mine once (he was harmelss really, so we weren't too upset!).
I think he was killed a few years ago at Christmas, after deciding that a bus lane was a good place to lay down in.*

*Any part of this story, from the man's appearance, to his eventual demise, may have been embellished, in the way that all good stories are, after time.
But the religious freaks are all too real.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 21 Sep 2004, 10:39, Reply)