My pal Steve
Liked a drink. He was out every Friday night with the work crowd, every Saturday with his pals and every Sunday with his brothers in law. Even when the others couldn't make it he'd still go on his own. Then he started popping into his local most evenings on his way home from work. He maintained he didn't have a problem because he never drank in the house. Friends expressed concern but he dismissed their worries as over the top.

One evening on his way home via the pub he called in at the chippy for a pie dinner. The girl rang up the items into the till and asked for payment in the sum of £3.40 at which point Steve said "and one for yourself as well". The girl looked at him like he was a complete tard.

He said he felt like he'd had an out of body experience. He stopped drinking altogether and has been dry since.
(Fireyfox is prepared to change, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 13:50, 2 replies)

I
was expecting that to be a pun.
(kitescreech still here, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 15:24, closed)

I had to
read that 4 times before I got it. I'm losing it.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 6:33, closed)