“So the boats flow down this channel and come to rest here...
"...and this is where we unload the goods in those big metal containers – if you look over there you’ll see we’ve got loads of those cranes. Perfect for this sort of work. Absolutely perfect. And if you’ll just follow me I’ll take you down closer to the water and you can have a chat with some of the workers. Watch out for seagulls – it’s like being hit with a brick if one of those little buggers shits on you.”

“Err… excuse me… BUT WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE DOING HERE?!? LOOK AT MY FUCKING ARM!!! LOOK!!! AMPUTATED AT THE FUCKING ELBOW!!! I’M PISSING BLOOD OUT OF THE FUCKING STUMP!!! I CAN SEE FUCKING BONE!!! B-O-N-E!!!”

……

……

“I thought you said you needed a dock tour urgently?”
( SpankyHanky, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 16:00, 8 replies)

Oh


and indeed,


dear.
(dxg, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 16:17, closed)

did you make that up?

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 16:34, closed)

this is way below your usual standards.
must try harder.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 17:42, closed)

Yes...
Yes I must... I'm sorry...

Suprised there haven't been more NHS-related puns this week, truth told.
( SpankyHanky, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 20:25, closed)

Kinell Spanky
Mine was better than that. Shame on you, shame.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 17 Mar 2010, 18:01, closed)

Ha!!!
True, very true - yours made me chuckle. This one is shit. But fuck it, passed a couple of minutes at work earlier.
( SpankyHanky, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 20:23, closed)

You
utter penis.
(berk, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 22:04, closed)

You fucking bastard.
You've ruined my life.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 18 Mar 2010, 9:23, closed)