Messing with people's headsTheophilous Thunderwulf says: What have you done to fuck with people? Was it a long, carefully planned piece of psychological warfare, or do you favour quick, off-the-cuff comments that confuse the terminally gullible? Have you been dicked with, and only realised many years later? Are you being dicked right now? Tell us everything.
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 12 Jan 2012, 11:25)
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Bruising the cucumberI've been blessed with an incredibly dumb sister-in-law. She enjoys bragging about her Honours English degree, even though my wife and I wrote all the coursework for her first three years of university. She couldn't write a coherent sentence to save her life. She's taken up with a posh young man who has even posher parents, so she's decided to cultuivate a taste for Pimm's. Pimm's is not a popular drink in Canada, so one fatefull afternoon while we were lounging around in the back yard, she offered to mix us up a couple of cocktails. I took a sip of miine and politely asked if she had bruised the cucumber. Her face became even more vacant than usual.
'Bruise the Cucumber? she asked.
'Yes' I said 'Bruising the cucumber releases oils that bring out the full the flavour of the drink. A cucumber for Pimm's is tradiionally bruised.'
'Oh', she said 'I didn't know that.'
An hour later I found her in the kitchen studiously thumping a cucumber on the counter. I had to leave the room before I began to giggle uncontrollably. Everyone, including her boyfriend, has been sworn to secrecy in hopes that one day she'll be caught thumping a cucumber by her oh-so posh Pimm's swilling boyfriend's parents.
(, Sat 14 Jan 2012, 18:40, 1 reply)
"Pimm's is not a popular drink in Canada"I knew there would be a good reason to dislike Canadians.
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monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 14 Jan 2012, 19:03,
closed)
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