Pea Roast
When I was evil step dad to two rather lovely little girls I used to take great pleasure in concocting all manner of lies to answer their questions, and believe me little kids can ask questions all day long.

One particularly inspired untruth occurred one day when littlest saw the pool table key I had attached to my key ring. This key was one of those round ones, like to a bicycle lock, and she asked what it was. Being the quick witted fellow I am I pronounced that it was the key to her belly button, into which it miraculously fitted. The story followed that when she was even littler she used to eat things she shouldn't and the doctors, fed up of opening her up every time, just gave me and her mum the key to her belly. Having not eaten the wrong things for a while the key slot, I informed her, had grown over so I could no longer open her belly, and that explained why she was the only member of the family with an out-ie belly button.

Aged 6, three years on, she still believes this lie, and whenever she sees someone with a d-lock key she proudly announces that I have one of them, and it's the key to her belly.
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Sun 15 Jan 2012, 13:33, Reply)