Mini Cabs From Hell
We've all taken a dodgy cab in our time. One guy asked me to give him a back-rub in exchange for letting me off the fare. I was like, "here's the cash mate." Another chappy claimed to be Paddy Patel - a child actor from UK TV series Tuckers Luck - he drove like a speed freak and regaled me with stories that "playing a black Irish boy. England wasn't ready for it." So go on - tell us your worst and we'll tell the world.
[edit: for those confused by the term mini-cab, London has two sorts of taxis: highly regulated, licensed and salt-of-the-earth black cabs that you see in films and a whole bunch of unlicensed, uninsured, random cars driven by nutters who aren't supposed to pick up from the street (you have to phone for them). They are universally rubbish]
( , Wed 26 May 2004, 21:44)
We've all taken a dodgy cab in our time. One guy asked me to give him a back-rub in exchange for letting me off the fare. I was like, "here's the cash mate." Another chappy claimed to be Paddy Patel - a child actor from UK TV series Tuckers Luck - he drove like a speed freak and regaled me with stories that "playing a black Irish boy. England wasn't ready for it." So go on - tell us your worst and we'll tell the world.
[edit: for those confused by the term mini-cab, London has two sorts of taxis: highly regulated, licensed and salt-of-the-earth black cabs that you see in films and a whole bunch of unlicensed, uninsured, random cars driven by nutters who aren't supposed to pick up from the street (you have to phone for them). They are universally rubbish]
( , Wed 26 May 2004, 21:44)
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Youwantataxicabmate?
"No" is usually my prompt, and appropriate response, yet a friend of mine, Chris, decided he'd be daring, and take one of these mini-cab fanatics up on their offer.
Everything's fine, Chris and his girlfriend get out of the cab, and go to pay.
"Can I take your number mate" the driver asks.
"...What?" Chris replies
"Well, I was just thinking, I'll give you a ring if I'm in the area or something"
"...er...ok", and with that Chris sealed his doom.
This taxi driving tit then decided that he'd ring Chris EVERY night for about a month, sometimes just sighing, sometimes asking him where he was, and what he was up to.
Suffice to say, it all ended rather quite suddenly, when Chris finally got sick of it, and roped in all of our mates to relentlessly phone this barely comprehendable taxi twat, on the hour, every hour, for a few days.
There's nothing quite as funny as declaring someone an "arsecandle" and "fucknut" down the phone, especially when the response is simply "whaaa?".
And the moral of this tale? If a random bloke asks you if you want to get in his car, and pay him to drive you, despite him not being a taxi driver - just a normal bloke - look him straight in the eye, and kick him square in the jaffers.
( , Thu 27 May 2004, 15:18, Reply)
"No" is usually my prompt, and appropriate response, yet a friend of mine, Chris, decided he'd be daring, and take one of these mini-cab fanatics up on their offer.
Everything's fine, Chris and his girlfriend get out of the cab, and go to pay.
"Can I take your number mate" the driver asks.
"...What?" Chris replies
"Well, I was just thinking, I'll give you a ring if I'm in the area or something"
"...er...ok", and with that Chris sealed his doom.
This taxi driving tit then decided that he'd ring Chris EVERY night for about a month, sometimes just sighing, sometimes asking him where he was, and what he was up to.
Suffice to say, it all ended rather quite suddenly, when Chris finally got sick of it, and roped in all of our mates to relentlessly phone this barely comprehendable taxi twat, on the hour, every hour, for a few days.
There's nothing quite as funny as declaring someone an "arsecandle" and "fucknut" down the phone, especially when the response is simply "whaaa?".
And the moral of this tale? If a random bloke asks you if you want to get in his car, and pay him to drive you, despite him not being a taxi driver - just a normal bloke - look him straight in the eye, and kick him square in the jaffers.
( , Thu 27 May 2004, 15:18, Reply)
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