MisunderstoodMy other half rang a courier today to get a disc sent over to a client. The courier company asked what it was she was sending. "A computer disc", she said.
Half an hour later, 3 blokes in a van turned up. They looked a little disappointed to be handed a floppy disc: they were all prepared to shift a computer desk across London.
Have you been utterly misunderstood recently?
(
chthonic, Thu 6 Oct 2005, 23:06)
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alcohol linguistics in ChinaI lived in Beijing for 3 years.
Early on I joined a local cycling cluband on my first outing we cycled about 60K in the countryside around the Ming Tombs. It was beautiful but hot as hell and the final stretch was a 10k shallow but constant uphill grade. Suffice to say I was in need of beer related recuscitation at the end.
I went in to the small store across the road from the finish point and, in my best novice Mandarin, asked for a bottle of Pe Jiu (chinese for beer, literally - flower alcohol, which is frankly a girly name for the great ales). The gent behind the counter passed me a green half-litre bottle of a brand I didn't recognise. It wasn't cold, but it was about 15p and the store keeper didn't appear to have a fridge (or electricity come to that) so I decided not to press the point. Some gesticulation based communication ensued and he opened it for me (I did not yet know the Mandarin word for "open", only having learned "thank you", "ashtray" and "beer" so far). Once opened I took a hearty pull from the bottle, expecting to down the lot and demand another bottle, hence impressing the storekeep and cementing the longnoses' reputation amongst the locals of these parts. As this liquid hit the back of my throat it became clear that he had misheard me. For a second I thought I had just swallowed bleach or white spirit, but realisation quickly dawned that I had in my hands a bottle of the famous local grog "bai-jiu" (literally - white alcohol), a whisky strength rice liquor drunk in vast quantities all across the Middle Kingdom. In my twisted foreign assault on the storekeep's language, I had clearly mispronounced pe-jiu ("pee geo") as bai-jiu ("bye geo").
In an attempt to avoid losing face (terribly important amongst the local johnnies) in front of the storekeep and his now gaping family, I continued my pull on the bottle and whiped my lips with my coat sleeve giving all impressions of having quenched my thirst. I thanked the storekeep and left with my image intact, but my throat burning and my stride a little askew.
My proudest moment in China was, 3 years later, getting trousered with a bunch of work colleagues and telling this story ... in Chinese.
(, Fri 7 Oct 2005, 8:24, Reply)
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