Active Sex
Upon finding an unused condom on my desk in my bedroom, my mother asked if I was partaking in “Active Sex”.
I asked what she meant by “Active Sex”. Was inactive sex performed alone?
She retorted “Don’t be so stupid” and stormed off.


It confuses me to this day.
(TheColonel, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 11:33, 8 replies)

Maybe...
...she was wondering if you were more of a fan of 'passive sex'.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 11:34, closed)

Exactly
Perhaps she was implying that you were in the habit of doing it with inactive partners. Coma girls don't say no
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 11:37, closed)

She was implying you were a 'giver' rather than a 'receiver'
Your mum thinks (as we all do) you're a shirter, Colonel.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 11:44, closed)

He's from Middlesbrough
so he's an asthmatic shirter.

Because of all the smog, see?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 12 Feb 2010, 11:52, closed)

you missed out Parmo eating

(TheColonel, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 14:57, closed)

Thank you for reminding me...

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 12 Feb 2010, 19:52, closed)

damn you Monty
that was pretty much exactly what I was going to say
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 13:01, closed)

She probably got the phrase
'sexually active' wrong.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 13:36, closed)