Balham (Again)
Not technically a nightclub, but The Duke Of Devonshire used to have a backroom that stayed open til 2am at weekends. I don't recall anymore if there was actually a dancefloor or not.

But regardless, I was dancing with a rather attractive but spectacularly drunk young lady.

There was much touching and kissing before she whispered in my ear 'Do you want to come back to mine and see my canary?'

Well...

Apart from being slightly bemused by the term 'canary', who was I to say no to such an offer?

So off we went, staggered back down to the high street, stopped for a quick fumble in the entrance to Woolworths (that's the shop, not what she called the bit I was fumbling) and then on to hers.

She pours us some wine in her kitchen, we talk some more.

And again she says 'So, do you want to come and see the canary?'

'Of course' I say.

And she takes me to the lounge, where, lo and behold she finally showed me her canary.

It was yellow, in a cage and called Carrie.

Next time someone uses a euphemism I am not familiar with, I am going to check that I really understood.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 15 Apr 2009, 14:52, 2 replies)

HaHa!!!
Great post! And at least she didn't offer to show you her meat and two veg.
( SpankyHanky, Wed 15 Apr 2009, 14:59, closed)

quick fumble in the entrance to Woolworths
Now that's a better euphemism, nice pre-empted :D
( LemonEntryMyDearWatson This time, Moriarty, the hand is on the other foot, Wed 15 Apr 2009, 15:15, closed)