One in the eye
It was a barbeque at ours a few years ago. When you are the parents of (at the time) 10 and 7 year olds, you take these opportunities to gather with other parents with children of a similar age. The kids go and brain themselves on the trampoline and the grown ups sit in the garden and slowly drink themselves silly.

A bit later on food is prepared. The kids all eat first coz the adults are still happy drinking. And inevitably the kids want drinks with their food.

Thus I find myself dispatched to the kitchen to retrive lemonade. And there on the worktop I find two 2-litre plastic bottles. These are of the 2-pack variety that supermarkets sometimes do where the sleeve encompasses both bottles.

Also in the kitchen - out of reach of small hands - was a large kitchen knife. Aha, thinks me - a dashing way to split the bottles. So I snatch up the knife, and in an over-elaborate arc bring it swiftly down to quckly and neatly separate the two plastic bottles.

Except of course, I had been exuberantly partaking of the aforementioned alcohol. The knife pierces the right-hand bottle dead-centre about an inch below the lid. And a small, but incredibly precise jet of lemonade squirts out of the hole and hits me exactly in my right eye.

No one saw this.
(PunkBubble Lady, I couldn't take another 67 of those..., Fri 28 Jan 2011, 11:19, 3 replies)

Slapstick
click
(Monkey the Chicken Twitter: death_stairs, Fri 28 Jan 2011, 11:24, closed)

Lemonade 1...
... 'Bubble nil!

*click*
( Ugi , it's a game of give and cake, Fri 28 Jan 2011, 11:30, closed)

I did somthing very similar a few years ago, except the knife slit down the bottle, leaving a gash that went most of the way into the plastic, which held the pressure for a second, the exploded, pressure threw my knife hand back a bit, not enough to kill me thank god.
(Mong goose, Sun 30 Jan 2011, 11:35, closed)