Vote for me to win qotw this week please.
Thanks in advance.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 18 Jun 2015, 12:10, 1 reply)

i didn't get a job once because i'm hopelessly incompetent

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 18 Jun 2015, 10:51, 3 replies)

This is a bit reverse-angle on the whole not-getting-the-job idea
In about 1998 I interviewed five candidates for a software development job. One was top class, three were so-so and one was a complete twat. I made my recommendation of Mr Top Class to HR and went off on my summer hols. On my return I discovered that my boss (who had not been present at the interviews) had trumped my recommendation and given the job to Mr Twat, who turned out to be even more of a tosser than I had expected, and became a thorn in my side for the next three years.
( notoolsovernight you're all luvvly an' 'orrible, Wed 17 Jun 2015, 23:12, Reply)

Not me. Dolly Parton.
Dolly Parton once lost a Dolly Parton lookalike contest…

to a Guy
(unicornflakes, Wed 17 Jun 2015, 23:12, 2 replies)

Recruitment consultants
When the dotcom bubble burst in 2001, I had to get a proper, normal job. So I contacted an agency to see if they could help me. I was called for an initial consult by a guy named Garth. I could just picture him, from his voice alone: cheap suit, too much aftershave, plays squash (aggressively) with Brian from accounts every Thursday, and thinks TOWIE is a lifestyle magazine.

So after collecting my technical skills etc, he asked me what kind of thing I was looking for. After summarising the kind of role I wanted, I finished by saying I'd ideally like to find something "Socially useful".

This clearly threw him. I tried to find other ways of explaining: "Ethical", "Responsible", "Positive contribution" etc. But it was hopeless: clearly the idea of desiring anything more than the fattest paycheck was beyond him.

I now work in education technology. Garth didn't get the commission.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 17 Jun 2015, 14:20, 5 replies)

The final round...
It was quite a few years ago and it was for a senior IT position in an insurance company.
After 3 interviews it was down to two.
The final round was an exercise consisting of interviewing a number of the staff (including some Big Blue bods) and determining a future strategy to present to the Directors.

Interviews conducted near London Bridge, then a cab to near Buck Palace and 30 minutes to prepare a presentation.
Then the show and tell and questions.

Didn't get it... but neither did the other guy.

It turns out that they had already appointed an internal but wanted the equivalent of two days consultancy for free.

Barstewards.
(bof, Wed 17 Jun 2015, 14:01, 1 reply)