I can no longer travel internationally...
...not without considerable difficulty, anyway.

It would seem that I am the namesake of quite a powerful figure in the financial world who caused a bit of an economic furore in 2000, and because our names are so closely matched, I set off all sorts of bells and alarms when I try to travel through customs.

The story goes: around about the time of the Camp David Summit (the negotiations between Bill Clinton, Israeli president Ehud Barak and Palestinian Chairman Yasser Arafat), a plan was drawn up between several powerful magnates and financiers to destabilise the economy of the Middle East by completely ceasing all trading with Israel's main economic centre - nothing would be bought or sold through their stock exchange system.

This would result in massive shifts in the global stock market ultimately leading to their own personal gain. It was a totally illegal, not to mention immoral, conspiracy.

The plot was discovered before they went through with it, and all involved went into hiding, hence me having problems travelling internationally now when my name comes up on security checks.

I haven't been on a single trip in the last ten years where I haven't been 'taken aside', roughed up a bit, and been made to prove that I wasn't involved in a Tel Aviv-shun program.
(Sloppy Giuseppe, Wed 17 Jun 2009, 14:49, 6 replies)

You fucking fuck
I salute you
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 17 Jun 2009, 14:53, closed)

Ha!
Twisted work of genius mate (or you need to be locked in a padded room). Either way, have a click!
( SpankyHanky, Wed 17 Jun 2009, 14:59, closed)

*rises to feet and applauds*
Bravo sir, bravo.
( TheMagicDwarf is back like ballroom dancing, Wed 17 Jun 2009, 15:12, closed)

Very good
you bastard
( Moey, Wed 17 Jun 2009, 15:51, closed)

Glad to see
that an afternoon spent idly reading articles about Middle Eastern politics on Wikipedia wasn't a total waste of my employer's money.

Cheers!
(Sloppy Giuseppe, Wed 17 Jun 2009, 22:35, closed)

This is
filled with win! Have a click.
( Funkenschlag still likes dogs more than cats, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 10:16, closed)