hamstersham
the night before new years eve 2000/2001 me and a couple of mates arrived in the shplendiferoush capital city of holland. like fat kids on cupcakes we began stuffing our faces with as many illicit substances as possible to work up enough courage to visit some ladies of the night. this done, i choose my lucky lady and wander into her boudoire, where i'm told to drop my threads and get on ze bed. after some amazing foreplay where she managed to strap a johnny on using only her face she assumes the position. so i'm back there taking it slow and steady, you know, showin her some respect, she says,"come on don't you know how to fuck?". without taking this too personally i embrace this criticism and pick up the pace considerably. to which my efforts are promptly met with, "shtop shtop i am not a machine!" so completely confused and totally off my stroke i try to strike up a happy medium, to which my efforts are met with, "okay time'sh up, get out..." after spending something like 200 guilders i was somewhat disappointed with my experience, so much so that i had to visit another lucky lady. unfortunately i could only afford a handjob.
(kalimah, Sun 22 Jan 2006, 22:17, Reply)