Pe Teacher...
My PE teacher had a sidearm throw that would knock a kid unconscious in dodge ball, which he used mercilessly and with sadistic glee. I wish I was exaggerating but he really did knock kids out with it, the ball made the air hum as it flew towards you and at the very least you were going to hit the floor hard after it got you - sometimes with the smaller kids they only hit the floor after flying a yard or so first, he celebrated those hits with an exclamation - usually "booyah" or "BAM".

I was one of the few people who could dodge his shots at all - every dodgeball day was basically just him nailing the kids one after another until the class was all "out" until it was just him and I, until he'd eventually get me too.

One day I made the mistake of trying to catch his 'bullet' attack - I did manage it, but I had friction burns on my arms and a huge red welt on my stomach from doing it. Still - was good for one day of kudos until the next class where he just got me in the head first thing. (I'm pretty sure he said "go" after it hit me ... but I could be misremembering - everything around that hit is a little shaky in my memory to be honest.)

After I got up - he accused me of something so nonsensical it's hard to remember now what it was, all I can recall thinking was a general "wtf?" - maybe he said I was faking being injured by his hit, that would have been in character for him - but whatever it was, as punishment for it I had to do thigh squats against the wall until the end of class.

It's a little hard to describe these if you haven't done them, but imagine sitting in a chair with your back against a wall and your feet flat on the ground - now remove the chair and hold yourself in the same position for as long as you can. A few minutes of that hurts as you quads get an endurance burn going... doing it (well, trying) for an hour is just torture, punctuated with yells from him whenever I slipped or tried to stop (I did manage to move the little trashcan under my ass for a few blessed minutes in the middle of class while he was distracted, that helped) still - I could barely walk afterward.

At the end of class as I was shaking and trying to stand and not to cry (it really hurt), he came over and said to me "See? Not so tough are you? Remember that. No matter how tough you think you are - you're still just a kid, and that's just kid muscle not adult muscle - it'll never compare." I remember it distinctly because I honestly just didn't know what the fuck he was talking about, I had no idea that - from his point of view at least - there was something personal and challenging between us.

Apparently, I had challenged his ego or supremacy or something by getting him out at dodgeball. But hey, he showed me.

If this were a movie or something I undoubtedly would have dyed his face purple or made him fall in a mud hole or something else brilliant, but in reality I just skipped gym a lot after that, I didn't really care about any of it - but I didn't want to deal with a crazy ass for an hour a day either.

He had a pet snake which he kept at the school, big black one (looking back ... he was probably compensating for something...) and a big tank of feeder mice. He encouraged the kids to play with the mice, make friends with them, feed "their" mouse, take them out and pet them and name them, and kids bonded with them... then after a week or two he'd pick one out to feed to the snake.

And of course, since no PE teacher story would be complete with out the paedo portion... he also had a crush on the cutest girl in our class. To be fair - we all did - she was awfully pretty and nice, but he was in his late thirties and she was 13. Also she was smarter and more mature than he was, so it would never have worked out.

He would leer at her and look down her shirt or up her shorts during stretches and whatever activities we were doing, and would "help" her with her stretching by putting his hands all over her... never helped anyone else in the class except her but there he was, helping spread those legs just a bit more or putting on hand on her back and one reaching around to her chest to help her lean over a bit farther. We all thought he was an asshole but ... we were kids, we were used to teachers abusing us one way or another - this was just one more thing.

Then one day he came into another class room (shop class) and started talking to her, resting his hands on her as he talked to her, stroking her hair... after her left the other students asked her if that was her father, and she had to explain that it wasn't. She was ashamed about it and tried not to talk about it.

When he did that I knew - even in my junior high brain - that this was out of control for him. Bad enough what he did in the gym, where only students could see and it could be explained away - but coming into another teacher's room to do it? That kind of stupidity will get you fired...

And it did.

Our new one was a nice lady who liked boats.
( Allisade would love to hear from you, Thu 19 Nov 2009, 20:27, Reply)