softball
I never set the field alight during games at school. I had a very slight frame (still do) and was always low on confidence, so I tended to shy away from the more competitive and physical side of things. Amongst my friends I was normally one of the best at footy and tennis, but put me up against the 'bigger boys' and I would inevitably shrink in to the background. Ah, glorious anonimity. When it came to picking teams I was among the group left before the fatties and asthmatics. I was once made captain of our form football team in the interform footy cup when I was 12. I hated it and we were a dismal failure; I had not a clue. Why my teacher picked me to do it I just don't know, but it was a real low point.

Anyhoo it was the summer term and I was about 15 and thanks to Stu and his newly acquired softball bat, we had been playing softball since March of that year and I was pretty good at it. Lo and behold, our PE teachers decided that for one week double games would be taken up with softball and we were off. Teams were picked and I was predictably left pretty near the end before finally getting the finger of disdain.

We were batting first and all the meatheads queued up to have their go, but they were standing astride the base and despite my repeated suggestions to move to the side to swing above the plate, their frustrated travails resulted in a few strike outs and a couple of guys on a few bases. It was my turn and considering there were only two of the lower eschelon behind me, our team was already being written off by our own failed meatheads.

Then the final insult happened; the outfield drew in, expecting me to, at best, dolly the ball up. Easy. Usually in school I let the situation get the better of me, but not this time. Before Mr Holt could say in his patronising style 'mersault, try standing to the side of the cone' I was there and with the nasty petty sledging still ringing in my ears I twatted that ball and it flew. Took the fuckers ages to get it back. I cantered around for a home run and then looked at my teammates and shouted 'fuckyouthatshowyoudoityoutwats'

I think Mr Holt liked that one...

All true. For a couple of hours I ruled.
(mersault, Mon 23 Nov 2009, 22:10, 1 reply)

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Softball is pretty shit.

Must admit though, it's ace when you connect properly with the ball, and just send it flying! Only ever happened to me once.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Nov 2009, 8:58, closed)