Lads Weekend
This is pretty much the story I will bang on about for the next 100 years of my life, oh well.

Last year we had just passed our GCSE's in the summer and were pretty much on top of the world, for a 16 yr old predicted D,D,D,D etc having got 3A's 5 B's and 1 C my mother was well chuffed, so when the prospect of a lads holibob to Bournemouth for a few days came up, she was more than happy to let me go and even funded the venture......idiot.

We got to bournemouth and started drinking heavily every day until the last night where we went completely mad, I ended up throwing up all over a table in a posh club and getting a bouncers foot firmly jammed up my arse as he drop kicked me from the door.

So fuck it, we all decided, lets go to the pier and do stuff.....anti social behaviour continued with us doing silly things like swinging our cocks around like helicopters and throwing bins over, then we saw her.

It was the gleaming bumper car ride of the pier, me and my mate knew what we had to do as soon as we saw it....We enlisted the help of two fat leicester boys and broke the security fences and proceeded to drive in the park with a following of 20 pissed people thinking we were gods gift to funnyness, we took it out on the high street and pushed it rediculously fast over speed humps and tried to tip the thing by swerving it.......then we saw the blue lights.

The cops who had obviously been watching every move on CCTV had come to pull us in, me and james jumped 30ft ran into the park and pretty much out ran all the fat donut eating twats......that was until the dogs came out.

Now I was pretty fit at this point, I could run for harrow, but this dog just kept chasing me, it eventually got hold of my leg and ripped me to the floor and to my dismay bit me in my fucking balls, cue 20 cops storming me pissing themselves as a 16 year old boy who had stolen a bumper car had a dog hanging to his nutsack.

I tell this story but no-one believes it because its so off the wall, it did happen, go and ask the bournemouth police if they remember me.

Oh and the funny thing is im going to brighton this weekend, I think im gonna wear a cricketers box when I go out....
(loopadoop loves toilets, Thu 22 Sep 2005, 18:48, Reply)