Clicks
This is how it goes: "Hi Spanky, my name's (insert name here). I'm gay."

Shake hands.

"Hi, I'm Spanky. I'm hetero, maybe bi-curious. Fuck knows. But I went through a phase of fucking women with more stubble than the average man. Maybe I am gay and deep in denial? No, actually no - you see I just love tits too much. And there's nothing as beautiful as a cumshot across a blonde Swedish teenage girls innocent looking face, is there?"

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS?!?"

"YOU FUCKING STARTED IT! I got your name closely followed by your shagging preference! I really couldn't give a toss! Let's go and get beer and nachos and start this conversation over."

This is a conversation I had with a mate of the Mrs. not long ago. Weird. Get's a click from me because knowing both types of gayers a) the raging Queens of the Desert types (who get right on my tits trying to 'terrorise me with gayness'). And just normal blokes, Christ, I know half the fellas on the Welsh Gay Rugby Team and they're all pretty normal. Well, let's just say being gay doesn't make you special or interesting - no more so than having brown hair, blue eyes, or a love of all things Batman etc. So if you happen to be gay and think this gives you a divine right to bore everyone else silly with this, well, just fuck off.

Great post, Mr Carrot.

PS - Gay Pride is fucking shit anyway. All those FUCKING WHISTLES and glo sticks.
( SpankyHanky, Tue 6 Apr 2010, 16:51, Reply)