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This is a question Procrastination

Outlook is a wonderful tool, but not when it keeps reminding you that it is now 96 weeks since you were supposed to finish a report you haven't even started yet.

Just how lazy are you? How long will you put off the essential or the inevitable? What do you fill the time with?

(We're too lazy to write something funny here. You do it.)

(, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 18:18)
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Nudie ladies
When I was in my early teens I had the great fortune of stumbling across a stack of razzle, fiesta and men only mags at a bus stop near my house that some friendly neighbourhood perv had bequeathed to the next randy teenager who happened by.

I had a problem.

Although the haul was the equivalent of discovering the Rosetta Stone to my teen eyes and grubby teen hands, there was absolutely no way I could stash all this porn in my room without my mum finding it.

So I decided to condense the porn. Refine the stack of twenty-odd mags down to one managable-sized ream of uber-porn. I would sift through, armed with a pair of scissors, and cut out the nicest sexiest dirtiest looking lay-dees and then make a scrapbook as the ultimate mastabatory aid.

It was a great plan.

Only I never got round to it. Instead I dumpped the pile of mags in the shed in the box my dad used to store the lawnmower in.

And then a couple of weeks later my ultra-Catholic, ultra prim n propper aunty wanted to borrow the mower...

My mum actually threw a plate at my head.

But she missed.

And in the end like all good Catholic mothers my mum was more relieved that I wasnt gay - apparently she had her doubts up until then.
(, Mon 17 Nov 2008, 16:13, 2 replies)
I thought you were going to say
that your poor old dad got the blame!
(, Mon 17 Nov 2008, 16:15, closed)
That would've worked...
... except I found out a few months later that my mum and dad prefered to make their own porn. Just never ever ever go routing through your mum and dad's draws. For years what I thought was a Remmington Fuzz Away actually turned out to be a 12 inch vibrating cock...
(, Mon 17 Nov 2008, 16:27, closed)

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