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This is a question Public Sex

Train carriages, car parks, behind the altar at midnight mass. Where have you done the dirty?

Thanks to SpankyHanky, Chart Cat and others for the suggestion

(, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 12:58)
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Not car sex..
Back in the day, young Sparkie was very easily led, and madly in love into the bargain. Not a good combination.

Now, the first ever boyfriend was 3 years older than me, and wore black leather, and rode a motorbike. Oooh the danger.. the excitement!

Well, it would have been, if he wasn't just a daft kid, same as me. And an eedjit that hated getting wet in the winter. Hence his decision to keep the motorbike in the garage for the winter, in favour of a Reliant Regal, not the van version driven by the Trotters.. oh no.. this was a car version..

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reliant_Regal

It's even the same colour.....
The Reliant Regal, as you can see, is a very small vehicle, rendered horribly unstable by it's lack of a wheel.. You hardly ever see them any more, which is a good thing in my book.

Anyhoo, there we were, the maiden and the muppet, rattling along a country lane, fired up with lust. (and three pints of Springfield Bitter apiece)when he spies an open gate to a field, and just aims his chariot, it's off camber and the angle is a bit scary but it should be OK if we don't go too mad.

Yeah right, two semi-drunk bags of hormones, not going too mad..

The next thing I knew just as the eedjit seems to be trying to fit both hands into my pink mitten, and visions of Sooty floated into my head totally ruining the moment, there's a horrible crash, and the world goes sideways. I was gazing up at a very starry sky, punctuated by low level groaning and swearing from the young man who was now beneath me.

"Arse" I added to the muttering, and managed to clamber my way out of the window, I left my shoes in the "Car" and squished my way out of the field and onto the road. Luckily, the sight of a stunned looking lone female wearing mud instead of shoes caused the first car to stop very quickly. Unluckily, this was a very quiet lane, so this had given the ex plenty of time to extricate himself and join me in an explanation of wtf we were doing there..

Willing hands soon got the "Car" as right as it would ever be, and we were soon off wobbling and ratting down the road home..

It doesn't count as Car Sex, if there wasn't any sex, or there wasn't a proper car, does it?
(, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 14:58, Reply)

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