Bunnies on a train
Several years ago my company was having an economy drive (except for the CEO of course) and I had to travel from Edinburgh to Bracknell......on the train.....on a Sunday. Joy!

I got on the train in Edinburgh, found my seat, and checked out the ticket on the seat next to me to find out how long I'd have before someone, who probably grunts and smells, sits next to me.

Eventually we pull into the station where this passenger is getting on. It's like being on a plane during boarding with an empty seat next to you. I'm weighing up who I wouldn't mind sat next to me and who I definitely don't want sat next to me......Or even better, hoping they've missed the train.....please god, pleeeease.

Well down the corridor approaches little old country-cottage bag-lady carrying a cage. Nooooooo. Please not her. Anyone but her. But it is. She pops the cage on the table, sits next to me and admires an advert for those one big slippers grannies have in her People's Friend.

The cage has got two rabbits in it and it stinks to fuck. The train is on its merry way and the cage starts rattling and moving along the table. At first I reckon it's just the movement of the train causing this, but instead the rabbits are shagging away, big time. Yay! I'm desperately trying to keep a straight face, like the guards from the "Biggus Dickus" sketch in "Life of Brian". But I make the fatal mistake of looking up from my magazine and catch the eye of the lass sat opposite, also trying not to laugh. It's game over. The pair of us crack up in hysterics.

All the while, bag-lady is tapping on the cage telling them to stop it. No chance. She then offers them some lettuce leaf. Coz let's face it, in the middle of a good hard shag there's nowt more tempting than a bit of lettuce.

Length? Too furry to tell.
(mr_spoon, Fri 30 May 2008, 13:18, Reply)