Non-smoking idiots...
I moved to Middlesbrough (where I have since taken up residence) for university just before the turn of the millenium. This has necessitated return trips to my beloved Aberdeen.

Originally, these trips were by bus, which led to some interesting experiences (such as the time when the bus I was catching to Glasgow was due to arrive at the same time as the bus I was catching from there to Aberdeen left. Unsurprisingly, I missed the latter).

But I can't get a return from Middlesbrough to Aberdeen by bus anymore I have now to let the train take the strain.

Back in the good old, pre-smoking ban days, there was one carriage on GNER trains that was smoking. So, I'd get the train to either Darlington or Newcastle, then get the train from there straight through to Aberdeen. Some music and a book (or, in the latter days, my laptop and some DVD's), large bottle of Dr Pepper and the only reason I had to move was to go to the toilet.

So, I'm in the middle of one such trip when I decide to roll a cigarette. As I am doing so, an oldish couple attract my attention and inform me that the entire train is now no smoking. I tell them they're wrong, and they inform me that it was just announced over the intercom.

They must have been banking on the fact that I was plugged into my personal stereo (no MP3 player at the time) and couldn't hear any announcements. What they don't know is that I'm a considerate traveller who turns his music down to a level where I can enjoy it but won't be (overly, anyway) annoying other passengers. This means that I can hear any announcements made as well.

But I decide to play along and ask the ticket inspector next time he comes along. The train stops at another station and two old men get on, sit beside them and instantly light up their pipes. The couple get up, pick up their belongings and flounce off to another carriage.

WHY? When you have the rest of the train to yourself, why would you sit in the smoking section and then complain about people smoking? Not even my non smoking friends can answer that one.

Length? Trip takes about 7 hours.
(williamthebloody, Sat 31 May 2008, 16:50, 1 reply)

wankers
i agree. i would have lit it anyway just to annoy them. and farted lots
(mr kyle he's a silly bastard, the one who posted before me, Sat 31 May 2008, 17:05, closed)