NINE HOURS.
After a somewhat delectable five day trip to New York, it was time to make the rather un-fun plane flight home. Let's set the scene: 80% of the 20-odd college kids that are on our trip are ill with some strange vomiting virus: how we managed to sneak them all through check-in I'll never know. Additionally, due to a cock up on the college's department, everyone's seats are interspersed.

Trust me to get the two rudest, most obnoxious, tipsy and loud Italian women I've ever come across.

And this is how they went about me wanting to jump out of the plane:

1. Talking very loudly in Italian. Constantly.

2. Stealing my fucking blanket.
In broken English:
IW: "It is cold, no?"
Me: "Yes, very cold."
IW: "You use blanket?"
Me: "Yes." *Blanket is rather obviously wrapped around me.
About 3 minutes later, when she thought I was asleep she reached over and took it. Cue the rest of the journey spent with my wrapped in my rather heavy winter coat.

3. Stealing my yoghurt. Bitch stole my yoghurt! Again, after waiting til I'd closed my eyes and attempted to drown out their incessant chatting. Obviously I could fall asleep with their quiet, considerate, yakking.

4. Looking over my shoulder at my DS. Seriously if there's one thing you don't do it's look over my shoulder!

5. Stick me on the window seat, refuse to move and mean I have to climb over them every time I run away to the other side of the plane to commiserate myself.

6. And finally, the piece de la resistance: After proving that a little broken english existed there, attempting to talk me. In Italian. And getting pissed off when I didn't understand. I speak several languages, of which Italian is not one. Please get that into your thick skill at least one hour after you try to talk to me next time.

...Seriously, I could not get off the plane quick enough when we landed. It was probably a half sprint, pushing everyone past, celebrating the fact I'd never have to see these two idiots again.


I am by no means a xenophobe, either, however these two washed-up 40 something "fashionistas" have put me off Italy for life.
(TheHBoxster is probably playing Beatles Rock Band on, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 6:53, Reply)