Cock Print
Some years back I had a last minute thought to get creative by giving the current Mrs Nutter a Valentine's Card with an imprint of my fellow.

Posh paper at the ready, I smeared the chap with pink paint but realised he didn't have much 'motivation'.

Not wishing to undersell myself I thought it best to make him stand to attention again. Stimulating thoughts however are hard to muster at 7am in the morning with your dick and bush covered in pink paint.

Somehow I managed to achieve the required woodiness, but it suddenly became obvious that I would need to include the balls as well to make the image recognisable and not just a smear of pinkness.

This meant that my initial positioning of the paper on my (home) office table was not practical for full length sack to helmet printing. The whole tackle would need to be lain flat against the paper.

The only solution I could think of was to put the paper on the floor and lie over it, hoping that I landed in the right place and didn't make a cock print on the carpet. I also had to support myself on strategically placed newspaper because earlier manual stimulation had left my hands covered in paint.

On my first attempt I realised that the paint had dried so another application was required.

In retrospect I hadn't really thought it all through, but eventually I made one with which I was pleased.

Before I finally acheived this perfect print I had made several OK attempts which I hilariously sold on eBay as "art".

And before anyone says anything, yes my Mum was delighted with her card.

Length? I used a whole tube of acrylic.
(kingnutter, Thu 12 Mar 2009, 17:23, 6 replies)

hahahahah
And you know what? One of those is currently hanging on my bathroom wall, Mr. Struggling Artist :D
( Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 13 Mar 2009, 13:24, closed)

Fantastic
What are the chances.

eBay banned me for THAT too...
(kingnutter, Fri 13 Mar 2009, 13:34, closed)

Really?
What else did they ban you for? :D
( Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 13 Mar 2009, 13:51, closed)

Get Rich Quick.
test.b3ta.com/questions/getrichquick/post215768
(kingnutter, Fri 13 Mar 2009, 14:24, closed)

Very nicely

( Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 13 Mar 2009, 14:54, closed)

Pictures, please
Of the art, of course!
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Sun 15 Mar 2009, 23:53, closed)