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The thing I've been most ashamed of doing with a penis
Confess. Female b3tans may need to improvise.
( , Thu 12 Mar 2009, 12:13)
Confess. Female b3tans may need to improvise.
( , Thu 12 Mar 2009, 12:13)
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Double girlfriend bruised cock shame
One day a work buddy of mine managed to slam into the side of a van on his motorbike - being a heavily built chap (he was a nightclub bouncer on the side), he was essentially uninjured.
Apart from his tackle.
Apparently his schlong very quickly went red and purple from the bruising, and his nuts ballooned to the size of oranges.
He couldn't walk, and the hospital were quite concerned about the general look of this and his future procreative ability, so they kept him in for a few days until he could walk unaided and to ensure the swelling was going down.
Did I mention he was a nightclub bouncer? One of the perks of the job was getting lots of lovely ladies throwing themselves at you night after night.
Now he had several liaisons on the go at once, and when they couldn't get hold of him on his mobile, or at home, they asked at the club. Who promptly told each one they could find him at the hospital.
So, imagine the scene, two girls turn up simultaneously at his bedside:
"Hello, who are you?"
"I'm his girlfriend."
"Err, no, I'm his girlfriend"
"Like fuck. Mike, what's her problem? Fuck off love."
"You get to fuck bitch, tell her Mike!"
And now a third lady enters the fray, and Mike has three harridans, screaming at each other, screaming at him, and the poor bastard can't get away from it, and all he can do look mournfully at his lap and the injured, useless member therein, and consider the 4 things he regretted doing with his cock.
( , Fri 13 Mar 2009, 12:35, 2 replies)
One day a work buddy of mine managed to slam into the side of a van on his motorbike - being a heavily built chap (he was a nightclub bouncer on the side), he was essentially uninjured.
Apart from his tackle.
Apparently his schlong very quickly went red and purple from the bruising, and his nuts ballooned to the size of oranges.
He couldn't walk, and the hospital were quite concerned about the general look of this and his future procreative ability, so they kept him in for a few days until he could walk unaided and to ensure the swelling was going down.
Did I mention he was a nightclub bouncer? One of the perks of the job was getting lots of lovely ladies throwing themselves at you night after night.
Now he had several liaisons on the go at once, and when they couldn't get hold of him on his mobile, or at home, they asked at the club. Who promptly told each one they could find him at the hospital.
So, imagine the scene, two girls turn up simultaneously at his bedside:
"Hello, who are you?"
"I'm his girlfriend."
"Err, no, I'm his girlfriend"
"Like fuck. Mike, what's her problem? Fuck off love."
"You get to fuck bitch, tell her Mike!"
And now a third lady enters the fray, and Mike has three harridans, screaming at each other, screaming at him, and the poor bastard can't get away from it, and all he can do look mournfully at his lap and the injured, useless member therein, and consider the 4 things he regretted doing with his cock.
( , Fri 13 Mar 2009, 12:35, 2 replies)
Very good.
That's pretty much how I imagined it, except with him supine and more bandaged.
( , Sat 14 Mar 2009, 10:04, closed)
That's pretty much how I imagined it, except with him supine and more bandaged.
( , Sat 14 Mar 2009, 10:04, closed)
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